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A few things happen to you after two weeks of vacationing in Taiwan. For starters, you learn to stop questioning what the food in front of you is and down it like you're a contestant on Fear Factor. You learn that there are crazier taxi drivers than New York City cabbies. You learn that Yao Ming has officially taken Asia over -- his perpetually dour mug, plastered on billboards and posters everywhere, is as ubiquitous in Taiwan as Mary Kate Olsen magazine covers in the U.S.

You also learn that it is, in fact, possible to go two weeks without sports, which is what I did. Fourteen days. Cold turkey. No SportsCenter, no NFL scores, no baseball hot stove updates. I never thought I'd miss Steven A. Smith's voice as much as I did. A few days into my vacation, when I finally came across a computer with a workable Internet connection in my hotel  I felt like throwing my hands triumphantly in the air like Tim Robbins in the rain at the end of The Shawshank Redemption.

Alas, the connection turned out to be slower than a Jerome Bettis juke, and getting Kevin Jones' statline from the Lions-Jaguars game was more maddening than trying to give a Taipei cab driver directions to my hotel. Meanwhile, the only evidence of Western civilization was a movie channel that inexplicably ran old Leslie Nielsen flicks on a continuous loop. So I decided that breaking my sports sabbatical just wasn't worth it; I wasn't going to worry that Duce Staley was in my starting lineup amassing as many carries as Nicollette Sheridan, I wasn't going to fret over my picks in my NFL survivor pool, and I certainly wasn't going to concern myself with the latest absurd Yankees rumor.

Needless to say, it's good to be back. Somehow, I went 1-1 in my football league (you should be ashamed of yourself, Sussman), somehow I'm still alive in the office survivor pool (it ends this week, Altobelli), and somehow, Kevin Brown is still a New York Yankee. Ah yes, the baseball hot stove is heating up. Some thoughts:

• Pedro to ... Miami? Why not? It's a move that makes sense both for the Marlins and Pedro Martinez. With Carl Pavano on his way out, Florida is looking for a veteran arm to stabilize its young but preposterously gifted rotation, and ever since Pudge left South Florida, the franchise has been looking for a huge Latin star for the South Florida community to embrace. Meanwhile, if you're Pedro, this is the place to be. Look what a relocation to the NL did for the careers of Roger Clemens, Eric Milton, and Jose Lima. Would you rather face the daunting AL East offenses or the less-taxing NL lineups? If the Marlins don't succeed in reeling in Al Leiter, look for them to go hard at Martinez, who is simply not going to New York and even more certainly not returning to Boston.

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• And this winter's biggest spenders will be ... the Detroit Tigers? That's right, baseball's most popular contribution to Jay Leno monologues in 2003 think -- and rightly so -- that they've got a shot at the AL Central title and consequently, payroll in Detroit may shoot up as much as $20 million from last year's $50 million total. The Tigers, of course, have already snagged themselves a legit closer in Troy Percival and are serious bidders in the Pavano sweepstakes and could even be considered a front-runner to land Adrian Beltre. The Tigers also covet Matt Clement, Derek Lowe, Corey Koskie and Troy Glaus. Finally, Pudge will have company in Motown. When I interviewed Rodriguez last season at Comerica Park, he was talking playoffs for his Tigers in '04. I laughed at him. If GM Dave Dombrowski makes the right moves, Detroit could be kings of the AL Central -- baseball's worst division -- in '05.

• Two predictions: Carlos Delgado will sign a three-year deal with the Mariners and Matt Clement will be pitching in Toronto in '05.

• Hard to argue against the Nationals' snagging Jose Guillen, but interim GM Jim Bowden made a mistep in signing Vinny Castilla. RFK Stadium will not be kind to hitters, and Castilla, 37, hit .218 away from Coors Field last year.

• Are the Mets serious about acquiring Sammy Sosa? Seems so. New GM Omar Minaya appears intent on making a splash and bringing Slamin' Sammy to Shea, but isn't an old, slow, crumbling slugger exactly what the Mets don't need?

• The Yankees' offseason revolves around prying Randy Johnson from Arizona, but I just don't see where the Bombers can come up with the players to satisfy the D'backs, unless New York is willing to part ways with Jorge Posada or Javier Vazquez. Surely a team like the minor-league rich Angels and Dodgers can improve on what Yankees GM Brian Cashman will have to offer, given the Yankees depleted minor league farm system.

The Yankees' best young starter might be Chien Ming Wang, who has a 97-mph fastball and impressive control. This year Wang was 6-5 with a 4.05 ERA in Double-A and 5-1 with a 2.01 ERA in Triple-A. In Taiwan, Wang is one of the country's most prominent athletes. (Chin Hui Tsao, the talented Rockies right-hander, is probably the most famous current baseball player. Fantasy geeks take note: Tsao is likely to emerge as Colorado's closer in '05 and has the stuff to rack up 35 saves for what's going to be another bad Rockies team.)

Another thing I learned in Taiwan during my stay: the people there love baseball and are as knowledgeable about their professional league as the average fan in the U.S. is about our major league. While I was there, the top news on the island was the seven-game championship series between the two best teams in the country's professional league. One absurdly humid night in the sprawling city of Hsin Chu, my cousins and I strolled through narrow neighborhood streets looking for a fifth-inning snack during Game 7 of the series. It was remarkable to see how many living room TV sets were tuned into the game as we passed by. What was going on? Was the Leslie Nielsen marathon on hiatus?