Taken out of context

Media Day at the Orange Bowl means finding that one good quote

By Pete McEntegart, SI.com

Reporters surround USC coach Pete Carroll on Media Day. AP • Pete McEntegart: The 10 Spot -- Mon., Jan. 3 • Orange Bowl scene: Speaking out of context • Truth & Rumors: Shawn Green to Diamondbacks? • Phil Taylor: The crystal ball for 2005 says ... • Chris Ballard: Sports resolutions for this year • Lang Whitaker: Seattle RB comes up a yard short • More Blogs: Bradley | Markazi | McAllister | Bechtel Click here for Today's Sign of the Apocalypse, Game to Watch, Leading Off gallery and much more!

MIAMI -- Many sports fans, much like Jets quarterback Chad Pennington, believe that being a sportswriter is a terrific gig. And, of course, it is, especially at a major event like the national championship game, with media buffets and boat rides and swanky Orange Bowl knapsacks. All free, of course.

What sportswriters don't want you to know, though, is that most anyone can do our jobs. All you need to learn are a few basic rules. At the risk of being cast from the sportswriting fraternity like those magicians who reveal tricks on Fox, here's one key lesson: Take quotes out of context.

Context is murky, it's gray, and it evokes images of flip-flopping politicians. Worst of all, it's boring. You can't let your audience turn the page or change the channel. Thus it's important to know how to unearth the one potentially incendiary nugget from an otherwise nuanced interview.

Such a skill is especially useful at a large media scrum such as Sunday's Orange Bowl Media Day. These events are designed to create hype, yet most athletes are wise to the game and avoid saying anything that might end up on an opponent's bulletin board. But should that stop us? No!

Heading into Media Day, the only juicy quotes from the weeks of buildup were from Oklahoma defensive end Larry Birdine, who in late December called the USC offense "average" and Trojan quarterback Matt Leinart "overrated." That's the kind of red meat we sportswriters love.

The next step is to ask as many USC players as possible about Birdine's quotes in hopes of getting a rise out of them. Here's one gem from Leinart: "I really could care less what he has to say." Take that! Them's fighting words, worthy of a snarky headline or juicy sound bite.

What your audience doesn't need to know is the full context of Leinart's quote. When asked about Birdine's barbs, Leinart actually said, "I have no comments on that. He's entitled to say whatever he wants. He has his opinions. I really could care less what he has to say or really anybody, I think. My main focus is getting the job done, leading my team, playing well, but that really had no effect on our team."

Of course, such reasoned discourse has no place in the sports pages. What is this, C-Span?

An excellent technique is to rephrase the question and ask it over and over until a coach or athlete finally cracks. Plus, it's not even necessary to phrase it as a question. This isn't Jeopardy! Simply preface any statement with the words, "Talk about ..." As in, "Talk about the USC defense." Or, "Talk about what you did for New Year's Eve." Or, "Talk about the free Escalade you're driving around campus."

Once the interview session is over, scan your tape recorder or notebook for the few gems that can be conveniently mangled beyond all recognition for maximum media effect. Just to get you started, here are some actual quotes from Media Day, which have conveniently been stripped of all that pesky context.

USC coach Pete Carroll on running back Reggie Bush: "He's got a gorgeous body."

Bush: "I was always really hyper in elementary school." This could be the start of another sportswriting staple, the athlete-overcoming-adversity fable.

USC tailback LenDale White, a Denver native: "I was the king of Colorado."

Oklahoma quarterback Jason White, on his experience at the 2001 Orange Bowl: "I don't think I even put my pads on." This could be blown up into another Thurman Thomas scandal from the Super Bowl when he couldn't find his helmet. Who needs to know that White was joking?

Oklahoma tailback Adrian Peterson: "If my football career doesn't work out, maybe I will be a Diesel model." This just in: Peterson distracted by off-field pursuits!

Oklahoma defensive back Antonio Perkins: "I can't swim." That's a shame, because Carroll reportedly thinks Perkins looks divine in a Speedo. (Another free tip: "Reportedly" is code for "not at all true.")

Birdine: "Nobody reads too much into all that media stuff." Wait, bad example. Let's not lose confidence in the power of the pen.

Still, if you can master these simple techniques, you too could be on your way to becoming a sportswriter. Can't you just feel your arteries hardening? We'd love to impart more wisdom, but we have to run. The lunch buffet just opened.