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Beer and Baseball

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Homer Simpson once summed up perfectly what it's like to watch a baseball game without beer: "I never realized how boring this game really was." I couldn't help thinking of that scene while I was doing a spot on XM Radio last night and host Holden Kushner asked me if -- in the wake of the many incidents of fan rowdiness this season -- alcohol sales ever will be banned at baseball games. (D'oh!) Jason Giambi was the recipient of a beer shower on his way back to the Yankees dugout in Oakland on Saturday, and on Sunday two other A's fans did the run-around-the-outfield-and-elude-security-guards bit. How very droll. Is this what Raiders fans do when they get tired of sharpening their spikes and eating their young?

Unfortunately, the proliferation of these incidents at other ballparks means we can't just lay the blame at the foot of Raider Nation -- lest we forget about Red Sox Nation. Earlier this season, Gary Sheffield had that run-in at Fenway Park when he tried to field a ball in the cozy right-field corner, and Rockies outfielder Matt Holliday was grabbed by a fan in the left-field stands at Dodger Stadium. When did ballparks become petting zoos? Last season, Oakland was the scene of the worst of these incidents in recent years -- the chair-tossing melee near the Rangers' bullpen -- and in 2003 Carl Everett got hit by a cell phone tossed from the upper deck. Chicago's South Side hosted the attack on Royals first-base coach Tom Gamboa in 2002 and Wrigley Field was the scene of the Chad Krueter bullpen brawl in 2000 and the Randy Myers' knockout of a bond trader who charged the mound in 1995.

Are restrictions/bans on beer sales the answer? Do we need to start treating beer aficionados like smokers? Do we need to surround the field with protective glass, a la the NHL? I'd hate to think so. There is something innately American about going to a ballgame and enjoying a hot dog and a cold one. So what do we do with the irresponsible idiots who try to ruin the experience for the rest of us? I'm in favor of exile by catapult, but I'm open to suggestions.
-- Jacob Luft (1:30 p.m.)

Bans on ballpark beer sales? Not gonna happen. While nobody likes it when drinking turns ugly, such incidents are infrequent enough that they wouldn't come close to counterbalancing the revenue that beer sales bring in. Twenty thousand people buying two or three beers at $6 apiece will take more than a few waylaid base coaches or airborn chairs to slow down. On top of that, the most belligerent of fans, the ones who are causing the problems, are also the ones who are pregaming like nobody's business, and if you cut them off at the park, they'll simply pick up the slack before the game.
-- Marino Eccher, Woodbury, Minn. (2:11 p.m.)

It's no wonder that there are more alcohol-related incidents at ballparks recently. With the current ballpark prices of beverages, only real alcoholics are gonna shell out for more than a beer. At $7 a beer, your six pack costs as much as a keg.
-- Evaneezer, Chicago (2:11 p.m.)

According to my Baseball Encyclopedia, on June 13, 1884, Baltimore surrounded the field with barbed wire after fans rushed the field the day before. I think we should try that!
-- Marc, Versailles, Ky. (2:11 p.m.)

Beer sales should stop. I've been to so many games where people get so unruly, and talk so foul, because they've had too much to drink. You think at $7 a beer, they would slow down, they don't. I've had beer spilled on me and to have to sit in the sun and have that stink on me all day is horrible. Even trying to wash it out some was not much help. Baseball should be fun for all. I say ban beer at the games.
-- Pam Barcus, California City (3:01 p.m.)

I'd be in favor of banning beer from baseball games, but it'll never happen because the profits are too great. After all, where else can you get a consumer to pay $9 for a Bud Light? The Red Sox were on the right track after the Sheffield incident -- ban the offenders for a year. Anyone dumb enough to be a repeat offender gets a lifetime ban from the ballpark, plain and simple.
-- Mike G., Ann Arbor, Mich. (2:36 p.m.)

Compared to the conditions in parks in the '80s (constant fighting, drunks everywhere, etc) I don't think we have much to complain about. We have seen a few isolated incidents, and in one of the cases you mentioned (chair throwing) it was heckling that was the cause. This isn't English soccer. People aren't throwing flares or killing each other. We have a few isolated problems. They happen. This isn't the Bruins jumping into the stands to brawl with fans.
-- Sean, Boston (3:26 p.m.)

The proper measure is prosecution. Stadiums need to have a court with a judge on their premises like Veterans Stadium used to. You interfere with play on the field, you're escorted to court and sentenced before the game is over.
-- Dan, Greenville, S.C. (4:01 p.m.)

These incidents are becoming increasingly common because the game has become a parody of itself. Steriod-pumping "athletes" who are being paid tens of millions of dollars a year to play a kid's game are so far removed from mainstream society that they are now being looked at in the same manner that one looks at the animals in the cages at the zoo. You want to see what an ape looks like? Go over to the primate section. You want to see what a real-life zillionaire looks like standing around a grass outfield doing nothing? Go to the ballpark. They are not even considered real people anymore, and drunk fans no more hesitate to throw a beer or batteries at a player than they throw an apple or banana into a zoo cage despite the prevalence of "Do Not Feed the Animals" signs.
-- Jim McCoy, Philadelphia (5:01 p.m.)

I notice no one is denying that there is a problem at all. If the baseball powers that be were smart (OK, big stretch there), they would eject fans for a heck of a lot less than attacking players. I have a 4- and 6-year-old who love to go to games, but there is always a foul-mouthed drunk in the crowd who just won't pass out and isn't asked to leave, so we stay home, watch TV and pay a heck of a lot less for the drinks.
-- Brian R., Enid, Okla. (5:36 p.m.)

I don't think beer is the problem. If a fan is stewpid (spelling intentional) enough to engage in the kind of behavior we've seen in recent seasons, that fan is hardly aware of anything other than light and sound anyway. Maybe a math test to enter the park. Nothing too difficult, addition of whole numbers, perhaps. That guy in Chicago that attacked that first base coach? No way he'd get past the gate. Throw some fractions at him and he'd be in a daze until long after his parole has ended, assuming it ever does, of course.
-- Billy, Austin, Texas (6:36 p.m.)

The most appalling fan behavior I've ever seen was in Anaheim and alcohol absolutely played a major role -- some jerk in the FAMILY section actually pulled out his unit (NOT a Whizzinator) and taunted the Seattle bullpen to get cozy with it, using the most incredibly profane language imaginable. Sure he was arrested, but he was so drunk he should've been cut off hours before. Beer sales at the ballpark should be subject to the same laws as in a bar -- make the seller liable for the actions of the overserved.
-- Mark, Nevada City, Calif. (8:01 p.m.)

I'm lovin the catapult idea, but I'm not sure Don Fehr and Bud Seligwould go for that. Ridiculously high prices for beer could help he problem because it would be a type of one beer a game limit, but that seems too extreme to me. How about have a drinking section, a la smoking or non smoking at restaurants? Have that section either not at ground level or behind some type of wall/barbed wire/electrical fence/National Guard. This would provide for no beer spilling on the guys who just want to watch a ballgame sober, as well as stop the petting zoo mentality at ballgames. As for the people who throw things ... catapult.
-- Tim Dwyer, Wichita, Kan. (9:11 p.m.)