Wonder how they spell "Orioles" back in Alabama? Donald Miralle/Getty Images

1. Orioles pitcher Eric DuBose was charged with driving under the influence in Sarasota, Fla., on Monday morning, about 12 hours before he was scheduled to start a game at the team's minor league complex. According to the police report, a deputy saw DuBose's truck swerve across the yellow line three times. Upon pulling him over, the deputy noticed that DuBose's speech was slurred, he exhibited poor balance, had watery and blood-shot eyes and an "odor of alcoholic beverage." When instructed to recite the alphabet, DuBose allegedly said, "I'm from Alabama, and they have a different alphabet." The line was instantly added to Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a redneck" routine.

2. Astros pitcher Roger Clemens' orange Hummer was found in a Houston parking lot Wednesday after it was stolen that morning when Clemens's son, Koby, drove it to school and left it unlocked. The thief evidently ran out of gas money.

3. A fifth-grade class at the Merriam School in Acton, Mass., is asking the Red Sox and Yankees to shake hands on Opening Day at Fenway Park on April 11. If the teams don't want to break major league rules against fraternization, however, the kids suggest a compromise measure in which the players refrain from tomahawk-chopping each other's glove hand.

4. The Pirates' 1979 World Series trophy could be sold at auction because its owner, the Allegheny Club, is bankrupt. The leading bidders are expected to be the Yankees, Red Sox and Barry Bonds.

5. A NASCAR appeals committee lifted the suspensions of two crew chiefs for alleged cheating during a race in Las Vegas. The three-man committee decided to let whatever happened in Vegas stay in Vegas. (Thanks to 10 Spot reader Todd Gillin of Philadelphia for inspiring that punch line.)

6. The United States is now tied with Italy at No. 10 in the March FIFA world rankings of soccer countries. That makes the U.S. an undisputed No. 1 among countries that don't really care about soccer.

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7. The latest evidence the NHL faces a world of hurt even when (or if) it solves its labor dispute came Tuesday in Red Deer, Alberta. Some 30 NHL players took the ice in what was billed as the Ryan Smyth and Friends Charity Tour. Alas, just about 800 fans -- in an area presumably starved for the NHL -- showed up to see Oilers left winger Smyth and his buddies. Of those 800, an estimated 100 were family and friends of the 30 youth-league players who took the ice during the first intermission. The owners and players may well be haggling over how to slice a pie that is shrinking by the day.

8. A jury ordered Bill Romanowski to pay former Raiders teammate Marcus Williams $340,000 in damages for smashing the tight end's face with a punch during a 2003 practice. The amount can be paid in either cash or dietary supplements.

9. 10 Spot reader Roy from Jacksonville didn't take kindly to Wednesday's item comparing potential Super Bowl host New York to Jacksonville. Wrote Roy: "There seems nothing can be said to defend my hometown from the constant jabs and snide comments about having the Super Bowl in Jacksonville, except one ... Jealous? When was the last time your hometown had the Super Bowl? Never? Then sit down and shut up. If personal attacks are your flavor, let me know. I'll be glad to hurl multiple insults onto a 5-9 punk sportswriter who never got past JV football and ended up playing on the high school tennis team." Well, Roy, I am indeed sitting down, but I will say that you must be looking at an old SI.com roster since I stand a legitimate 5-11. It's true that I never got even as far as JV football, though in fairness my high school didn't have a football team thanks in part to limited field space in Manhattan. (But have you heard about our state championship basketball team?) We didn't have a tennis team either, for that matter. In closing, though, my city could beat up your city, if only because we outnumber you by about seven million people.

10. Reader submission: The winning entry comes from Steven Harrison of Charlotte, N.C., who writes, "Marcus Vick returned to practice with Virginia Tech on Wednesday, saying he had learned from his past indiscretions thanks in part to advice from Allen Iverson, another Hampton Roads (Va.) product. Although AI no doubt had some sound legal advice for the younger Vick, he was unable to help him learn to pass the ball."