Coverage of NFL's 'other' big day is out of control

	Mel Kiper Jr. and his hair are back for another draft. Courtesy of ESPN

It's the end of April, which means sports fans are asking two questions: Who the hell is Mel Kiper Jr.? And when is he going away? The annual draft onslaught has been in full force since well before the college bowl season began, and this year it's being laid on thicker than Ed Hochuli's neck. At this point, the NFL draft has become the most overanalyzed, belabored event in all of sports.

At the center of this massive swirl is the inimitable Kiper, ESPN's resident "draftologist." One can only assume he earned his degree in draftology at a college that also offered courses in mixology and bracketology. Kiper's insider information is occasionally enlightening, and he delivers it with a rhetorical flair that would make Cicero proud: He stares at the camera and yells very quickly. Apparently, we sports fans are all operating under the assumption that if something's said in a loud voice, it must be accurate.

No one's quite sure where he came from, but every year Kiper stomps back onto the scene with his Big Board and screams at us for a couple of months. Then he disappears again, presumably to spend time with his family, yelling that they have to get their 40 times down if they're going to be shut-down corners in this league. Kiper does provide one of spring's guilty pleasures, though: making cracks at the expense of his hair. (While some men use hairspray and a blow-dryer, Mel styles with varnish and a wind tunnel.) Kiper is the most visible of these draftniks (who are like beatniks but without pretentious poetry), but they're multiplying like Gremlins.

Is all of this analysis actually telling us anything? The NFL draft is notoriously tough scouting for anyone outside of the Patriots' front office, but that never seems to come up when the talking heads are staking out their positions on where Vince Young will go. No one ever stops, looks at the top 10 players and says, "With any luck, one of these guys will be great, four will be very good, three will be starters, one will truly suck and the remaining one will be the love child of Ryan Leaf and Akili Smith."