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Commencement time

This year's five best and worst graduation speakers

Posted: Wednesday May 23, 2007 10:28AM; Updated: Thursday May 24, 2007 4:55PM
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Bob Barker (seen here with Rachel Reynolds, one of
Bob Barker (seen here with Rachel Reynolds, one of "Barker's Beauties") was the keynote speaker at Drury University's recent graduation.
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By Eric Horowitz

Finals are over, families have arrived, and May flowers are blooming on campuses across the country (and by blooming I mean schools are planting fully bloomed flowers the day before parents arrive). That's right, it's graduation time again. It's a time for students to reflect on the end of a long journey, a time for parents to revel in the accomplishments of their children, and above all, it's a time for colleges to show off the spoils from their hunt to find the most prestigious graduation speaker. Some schools had more success than others, and I'm here to let you know which schools made the five best and five worst speaker selections this spring.

The Best

1. Drury University -- Bob Barker

Who better to deliver the keynote address than the school's most famous alumnus, the one and only, Bob Barker. In addition to giving a speech, Barker received an honorary degree, which is interesting because he received a real degree when he graduated from Drury 60 years ago. Can you even give somebody an honorary degree if they already have a real one? Did they have to rescind his real degree in order to give him the honorary one? I'm confused. Either way, I can't think of a better way to send graduates into the real world than by telling them "Help control the pet population; have your pet spayed or neutered."

2. University of New Hampshire -- Bill Clinton and George H.W. Bush

Anytime a school recreates a 1991 presidential debate at its graduation you know it has done a good job. Many schools were able to land either a Bush or a Clinton, but New Hampshire snared one of each. Having the two together sent an inspiring message of non-partisanship, and it also showed the new graduates that whether they were working hard or goofing off for the last four years, they can still be president.

3. Providence College -- David Gavitt

Gavitt helped create the Big East Conference and served as the conference's fist commissioner, but his most memorable achievement was coming up with the idea to send America's best NBA players to the Olympics on a so-called "Dream Team." That means we have Gavitt to thank for the comedy that now ensues when America's best NBA players repeatedly lose to slow, balding men from Greece and Argentina. I'm sure Gavitt's take on this made for an excellent speech

4. Chestnut Hill College -- Dick Vermeil

Graduation can be an emotional time and Vermeil surely had the audience teary-eyed--most likely by leading by example. Vermeil was also able to use his experience with Kurt Warner to teach the graduates that even if they weren't superstars in college, it's still possible for them to have three or four years of success before fumbling their careers away.

5. BYU -- Dick Cheney

This easily could have gone under the worst speaker list, but anytime a speaker is so controversial that students raise $20,000 to have an alternate graduation with Ralph Nader, I say that's a good thing.

CLICK BELOW FOR THE FIVE WORST GRADUATION SPEAKERS

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