Everything you need to know about the upcoming season

By Phil Guidry

Since the Florida Gators held Troy Smith to three feet of offense en route to the national title last January, much has happened in the sports world. We've had allegations of steroids, animal cruelty, corruption ... but enough about the Tour de France. We probably speak for many sports fans when we say that the college football season can't get here fast enough.

Will Joe Paterno give his Nittany Lions a thumbs-up for their stadium cleaning? Stay tuned... Steve Manuel-Pool/Getty Images

Let's begin by assuming that any college football fan with even a shred of common decency will make Virginia Tech at least their second-favorite team this season. Now that that's settled, we can concern ourselves with more trivial things like...

The biggest storyline

The growing support for a "plus-one" game to settle the annual national championship chaos. The plan combines the excitement of a playoff, the bowl games' nod to tradition and the every-game-matters finality of the best regular season in sports. And it makes a lot of sense, which means it has no chance of happening.

The second-biggest storyline

Just how clean Beaver Stadium will be? Penn State coach Joe Paterno is ordering his players to clean the stadium following every home football game as a disciplinary measure. Who says JoePa has lost touch?

Player to watch

Darren McFadden, Arkansas. Last season's most electrifying player is back, and erratic quarterback Mitch Mustain is no longer there to get in the way.

Coaches on the hot seat

Clemson's Tommy Bowden and Texas A&M's Dennis Franchione. Both have fallen short of tremendous expectations and their respective rabid fan bases are running out of patience.

Coach who will get the most attention for a middle-of-the-pack eight- or nine-game winner

Nick Saban, Alabama. That is, if he doesn't skip town for a new job before then.
Runner-up: Charlie Weis, Notre Dame.

Story that has already been written

Notre Dame struggling out of the gates in Year 3 of the Weis era, then coming together for a strong finish to the season that sets the stage for a national title run in 2008.

Best nonconference matchup

Miami vs. Oklahoma... if this was 2001. Or 1983. But since it isn't and both those traditional powers are coming off tumultuous offseasons, let's go with Virginia Tech vs. LSU on Sept. 8. But speaking of OU ...

Most dramatic turnaround

Oklahoma, which apparently went 0-4 back in 2005, should be back in the BCS mix. Wow, from winless to BCS contender in two short seasons ... see how stupid that sounds, NCAA? Slap 'em with probation and a fine, take away a few scholarships, but give 'em back their wins.

Game David Klingler will most likely be watching

Will Colt Brennan break David klingler's record for most yards and touchdowns in a game? And why did he ever grow these awful braids? AP

Hawaii vs. Charleston Southern, Sept. 23. The former Houston QB's single-game records of 716 yards and 11 touchdowns will be on the line as Colt Brennan takes on the South Carolina Class 4-A high school state champions. Regardless of whether Brennan breaks the record, at least he got rid of those dumb braids in his hair.

Best QB tandem

Tim Tebow and Chris Leak ... oh, wait, Leak is finally gone? You're kidding? Since when did the NCAA take away his ninth year of eligibility?

Coach who probably wishes he'd have stayed at his old job

Bobby Petrino, formerly of Louisville and now of the Atlanta Falcons. You know, because Brian Brohm would be an upgrade over Joey Harrington.

Announcer we're glad to welcome back

Ron Franklin, whose easygoing style and Texas twang have made him one of the best in the business, is recovering from an April car accident. He's expected to return for the season.

Most tantalizing road trip possibility

Oregon and Boise State may play the first college football game in China in 2009. Most will cringe at the thought of those hideous neon uniforms representing the most tradition-rich sport in America, but we can think of 1.3 billion reasons why UO alum and Nike chairman Phil Knight might be a fan of the idea.

Greatest heist

You can make a case for USC snatching star recruit Joe McKnight out of Louisiana, but the real answer here is the Florida law grad who allegedly conspired to steal a Florida State national championship trophy. That's just great. It's not enough that UF has been stockpiling national titles, now they've got to steal other schools'.

National Title Game Prediction

A one-loss team from the SEC will face USC in the title game ... unless the Big East winner manages to go undefeated. Or a Big Eleven power recovers from its bowl game hangover and runs the table. Or Colt McCoy channels Vince Young and the 'Horns win it all. Or Cal reprises its 2004 magic and knocks off the Trojans. Or Virginia Tech focuses their incredible emotion and talent for an unbeaten run. So ... your national champion will be either USC, LSU, Florida, Tennessee, West Virginia, Louisville, Cal, Virginia Tech, Michigan, Ohio State or Texas. Guaranteed.

Even More Guaranteed, Surefire Prediction:

As has happened in six of its nine seasons, the BCS will make a colossal mess and upset somebody.

Phil Guidry is a Contributing Producer for Jim Rome is Burning.