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Mailbag (cont.)

Posted: Wednesday April 4, 2007 11:16AM; Updated: Wednesday April 4, 2007 12:26PM
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Nothing goes better with a baseball game than a hot dog.
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I'm so happy baseball season is here. What do you like to eat and drink at the ballpark? Do you have any favorite snacks from stadiums. Nothing beats a Dodger dog. I dated a girl once who refused to ever eat during games, and I broke up with her. Please tell me you aren't one of these girls.
-- Ryan, Los Angeles

Until my New Year's Resolution went into effect, I really enjoyed an ice cold beer and hot dog at the park. Since 2007 has taken effect, my tastes in stadium food have undergone a little altering. For one, the beer has been replaced with water. It's still ice cold, refreshing, and doesn't have all the empty calories a beer packs. Plus, it has the added bonus of letting me keep my wits about me, so I don't punch the obnoxious fan behind me every time he heckles my team. As for hot dogs, they are fine on occasion, but there is something disturbing about eating a piece of meat that is comprised of all the other spare parts of animals. I mean, come on! Why can't they just serve steak at the ball parks?.. At least then I know what I am eating. One thing I can't let go of at the ball park is cinnamon roasted almonds. Sure, they may not be the healthiest thing on the block, thanks to all the sugar, but they taste absolutely amazing and are worth every bit of that extra five minutes on the treadmill.

Jenn, my friend is completely off his rocker. He wants to have his bachelor party in Iceland! And flights cost more than $500. Do you think it's odd to have a bachelor party in Iceland? And don't you think it's rude that he wants us to spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars for his bachelor party? Keep in mind, this is a guy who didn't even bring a gift to my wedding. He claimed there's some ridiculous etiquette rule that says he has a year to give a gift.
-- Dan D., Coram, N.Y.

I would first ask your buddy what the hell there is to do in Iceland you can't do in America for a bachelor party. Is there any particular significance this location holds for him, or did he just wake up one morning and say "I think I will have my bachelor party in a completely different country?" Regardless of his reasoning, just explain to your buddy that footing the bill for a flight and other miscellaneous expenses simply isn't in your budget right now, and while you are sure that a trip to Iceland would be legendary, you just can't justify spending all that money right now. Tell him you will have to pass on this particular guys outing, and will throw him another bachelor bash upon his return. As for the gift thing, I'd say you have every right to be miffed. If he came to your wedding, ate your cake, and drank your booze, well, the least he could do is get you a toaster, or something.

My high school girlfriend and I went to different colleges. She wanted to see other people while still being connected to each other. She flunked out from too much partying and her parents, once she moved back home, treated her like a 16-year-old again. I told her that she should move down here. She has announced that we are engaged to everyone, which was not quite as serious a commitment that I wanted to make. Now she tells me that she said that to keep her parents off her back. I'm confused since I still love her but I'm not ready for marriage yet. What is she thinking really?
-- John Taylor, Redding, Calif.

Sweetie, I am afraid she is just using you to get out from her parents wing. Sometimes when people's lives at home are bad, they often resort to living with or marrying someone else as a means of escape from their world. Her parents probably didn't want her living in "sin" with someone she wasn't betrothed to, so she concocted the fake engagement as a means of appeasing them enough to move out. If she does in fact move in with you, I would suggest you lay out some ground rules and let her know where you guys stand. No 1: YOU ARE NOT ENGAGED. No. 2: Get a job or get your ass is out. It may sound like tough love, but sometimes that is the only thing that works. There is a reason her parents treated her like she was 16. You don't want to spend the rest of your life playing a parent to someone with whom you are supposed to be in a relationship. My advice? Find someone who has a career and wants the same things you do, and isn't looking for a meal ticket or a retreat from mommy and daddy's house. Then, maybe you'll have a chance at being in an adult relationship.

Hi, Jenn. I'm in a little bind and I need your advice. So my ex-girlfriend dumped me late last year and broke my heart and it has taken me a long time to get over her. She recently re-surfaced and now likes my best friend. I am not sure if anything has been going on, but my friend knows my feelings toward her even though its been a long time since the breakup. I have gotten pretty mad at my best friend and now don't talk to him. Am I acting unfair and should accept it, or is my friend crossing the line? Please help!
-- Matt, Chicago

Friends and ex's dating is always a tough spot. On one hand, if two people get along great and click better than the other two, then I see no reason they shouldn't see if there's chemistry. However, the best friend in me says that I would never date my best friend's ex without so much as discussing it with him him or her.

I've seen this happen all the time, because more times than not, best friends share a lot of the same common interests, by liking the same sports, clothes, and sometimes, people. But the solution to this is about having respect for all parties involved. If your friend really wanted to go about it the right way, he should have come to you before things got out of hand and the relationship got in full-swing, and asked if you had any issues with the two of them dating. It seems only fair that he ask for your feelings on the matter. As for the girl, she is as much to blame. She may be talking to your friend just to make you jealous, or she could have genuine feelings for the guy. However, she could have also come to you and asked if you had any objections to them seeing one another. Communication is key in matters like this, and if you can't be adult enough to talk about the matter, then maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship in the first place.

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