By Ty Hildenbrandt

ALAS, THE PROPER ANALOGY FOR THE LOPEZ BROTHERS

Are Brook and Robin Lopez a modern-day version of The Rockers? John Burgess/SI

I've been grappling with this question all season: Is it just me, or do Stanford's Brook and Robin Lopez have serious Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty potential? Aren't these guys college basketball's version of the WWF "Rockers" tag team circa 1991?

Think about it -- just like the WWF tandem, the Lopez Brothers are devastating as a team, characterized by their intense on-court emotion and championship-worthy with a brute combination of scoring and defense. Does the shoe not fit? Meanwhile, one seems destined for stardom (Brook) while the other seems destined for a more non-descript career (Robin); and you can see the writing on the wall that this duo will eventually get broken up. Let's just hope that's due to the NBA Draft and not a controversial "super kick" through a plate glass window at Brutus the Barber Beefcake's barbershop. That'd be ugly.

MEMORIAL GYM: WEIRDER THAN JOHNNY DEPP

Reason No. 1 why Vanderbilt's Memorial Gym marches to its own drummer: It was built 56 years ago and people still stroll into their respective offices after watching a Vandy game saying "Have you SEEN that court?" Like, whoa.

The history on Memorial Gym's quirks is pretty straightforward. Back in the day, it was constructed as a hybrid concert hall and arena, thus explaining the quirky platform on which the hardwood resides and the crazy acoustics of the building. In addition, the arena has extra-wide out-of-bounds areas at courtside -- perhaps giving it more versatility for other events -- and the benches remain situated underneath each basket. So, in a sport that shows relatively little variability in terms of playing arrangements, Memorial Gym is the proverbial man with two heads.

And that's a big advantage. Though the marvels of modern science could surely change the configuration, Vandy has no real reason to alter its tradition now. Why should it? The last four No.1 teams to come into Memorial Gym have fallen, and the Commodores have a decided advantage in nearly every game they play at home.

THE EYE-POPPING FACT THAT WILL JOLT YOUR AFTERNOON

John Riek has many interesting qualities. He's from Sudan. He's 7-foot-2. He's got the option to head to college OR the NBA next season because of his birth date.

Oh, and somehow he's only 18.

By comparison, Greg Oden looks like a teenager and I didn't start growing facial hair until college.

GET OFF THE FENCE: 10 QUESTIONS THAT COULD IMPACT YOUR 2008

The editor of this space -- yes, there is someone that actually approves this stuff -- has suggested that we let you, the general readership, answer these questions. Send me your thoughts ...

1. Better infomercial product? Quick 'n Brite / Tony Little's Gazelle

2. Bigger Tar Heel weakness? Team defense / Masculine school colors

3. More ferocious MMA name? Kimbo Slice / Tomasz Drwal

4. More overrated basketball conference? Big Ten / SEC

5. Better Patrick? Dan / Danica

6. More painful to watch? Ohio State's slide / The "play-in" game

7. Weaker Mike Tyson's Punch Out opponent? Don Flamenco / King Hippo

8. More joke-worthy part of O.J. Mayo? "O.J." / "Mayo"

9. Luckier Monopoly game piece? Wheelbarrow / Thimble

10. More devastating Pitt injury? Mike Cook / LeVance Fields

CULTURE CORNER

So, I know Flo Rida's been pushing the whole "boots with the fur" phenomenon; but as more and more ladies jump aboard the bandwagon, I can't help but notice that a pseudo-competition has begun. Naturally, with women constantly trying to out-do each other, the implication seems that more fur is sexier. And to be honest with you, I saw a particular subject walking the streets in the last week with Mufasa's mane strapped to both ankles. Whoa there, missy. (Not sure how she pulled it off without tripping.) Style is one thing, but prancing around with full-fledged minxes on your feet makes you look more like a Clydesdale than a hip little number. I'm just sayin'...

Ty Hildenbrandt writes Campus Quick Slants every week. E-mail Ty at tyhildenbrandt@gmail.com with your comments, questions and random observations.