Your guide to the weekend, SIOC style.
Tennis Exhibition: Pete Sampras vs. Sam Querrey, "The Pit," 7 p.m.
Pete Sampras returns to the court to raise money for the University of New Mexico Children's Hospital. Whether you come to reminisce about American tennis dominance (am I the only one who misses Jim Courier?), to see Querrey's dynamic serves (he holds the ATP record for most consecutive aces), or to catch a glimpse of Mrs. Pete Sampras, Bridgette Wilson (better known as the lovely Veronica Vaughn), it's sure to be a good time for all.
Lecture of the Week: Family Guy Producer Mike Henry talks to Rochester Students, 7:30 p.m.
Cleveland's slow, monotone voice will give students a behind-the-scenes look at the only show with an entire character dedicated to pedophilia jokes. I'm not sure exactly what lies behind those scenes, but it's probably a mix of toilet humor, random kicks to the groin and semi-illegal narcotics.
17th Annual Dog Olympics, N.C. State, 10 a.m.
Some of the more intriguing events include a howling contest, a wiener toss and dog limbo. Unfortunately, there's no million dollar bonus if your dog wins eight gold medals.
100m Relay Guinness World Record Attempt, Cornell University, 11 a.m.
The current record for most people to carry a baton 100 meters in a continuous relay is 801. This weekend the Usain Bolt wannabes who set foot on Cornell's Barton Track will valiantly attempt to break that record. The relay is open to anyone except members of the U.S. track team -- they were banned due to their propensity to drop the baton.
Georgia's Redcoat Marching Band Plays Indiana Jones for ESPN
Well, sort of. In order to promote the new Indiana Jones DVD release, ESPN will film the marching bands of the top 10 NCAA football teams as they play the Indiana Jones theme. The clips will air in October in a quasi-battle of the bands broadcast. I think we can all agree this is exactly the kind of original, informative, sports-focused programming people crave. It's certainly not something the network is only doing to collect million-dollar checks form Paramount Pictures.
NCAA Field Hockey: 2008 Terrapin Invitational, University of Maryland, 11 a.m.
The big match of this five-team tournament will come Saturday afternoon when the top ranked Terps take on No. 7 Syracuse. A convincing Maryland victory will make them a favorite to win their third national title in four years.
NCAA Football: No. 17 Penn State at Syracuse
Much to LaVar Arrington's chagrin, there's now one more bar where Nittany Lions fans can watch the game. Arrington's plan to purchase a State College bar and rename it "Linebacker U Sports Café" appears to be all but dead. It's just as well -- I'm not sure other Penn State linebackers want to be associated with Arrington's lackluster NFL career.
MIT Cricket Tournament Championship Game, 6 p.m.
After a hiatus lasting nearly a decade the MIT Cricket Club is back and better than ever. Now is the time when all those late nights spent alone practicing your googly will finally pay off.