"It's pretty humbling. That's as bad a game as I've ever been involved with from the offensive side.''
-- Washington coach Mike Shanahan, after his team was whitewashed by the Bills 23-0. It was the first time in 267 NFL games that a Shanahan-coached team was shut out.
"I do not plan on coaching next year ... I plan on being in the same seat next year.''
-- CBS analyst Bill Cowher, on "The NFL Today'' pregame show Sunday.
The one quote Cowher needs to utter if he wants to stop all the speculation -- but he won't, and he shouldn't -- is this one: "Under no circumstances will I coach in 2012.'' Why shouldn't he? Because how does he know if the perfect opportunity will arise in January -- a team that has a terrible year but has a chance to turn it around quickly, maybe beginning with the drafting of Andrew Luck?
"A ton, a ton, and I love every bit of it. I really look forward to the opportunity to prove the naysayers wrong and Hue right."
-- New Oakland quarterback Carson Palmer, on radio station 95.7 The Game in the Bay Area, after being asked about the pressure that comes with the job of being handed the responsibility for getting the Raiders in the playoffs.
"We're probably going to be known as the team that was one strike away. I hate that, but that's probably how we will be remembered."
-- Texas Rangers reliever Mike Adams -- a lifelong Dallas Cowboys fans -- as he stood at his locker after the Rangers lost Game 7 of the World Series in St. Louis. He referred, of course, to the Rangers twice being one strike away from winning the Series in six Thursday night.
Back in the olden days, we all thought the Eagles would go to seed without Brian Westbrook. Just goes to show no one in this game is irreplaceable. Watching the Sunday night game, it occurred to me that LeSean McCoy, in the Eagles offense, is the perfect replacement as a runner and receiver for Westbrook, and these numbers illustrate that.
McCoy was a part-time starter in his rookie season, 2009, out of Pitt. Since the start of the 2010 season, McCoy has played 22 games. I compared his production in those 22 games to Westbrook's peak-production seasons, his 15-game 2006 season and the first seven games of 2007. Here's the comparison:
Warren Moon was a first-ballot Hall of Famer in 2006. The most yards he ever passed for in one NFL season was 4,690. Cam Newton is halfway through his rookie season. He's on pace to throw for 4,786 yards.
So my wife and I finally moved into our apartment on the east side of Manhattan (so fun to move during the season), and two interesting encounters happened on move-in day:
1. While I waited with golden retriever Bailey outside a D'Agostino's food store for my wife to get a few things, a stream of customers leaving the store noticed Bailey and threw out a "Good dog,'' or "What a well-behaved dog,'' or whatever. Then one woman, about 75, came out and looked us both up and down. I smiled at her and said, "Hi.'' Bailey smelled her shoes. The woman gave me a disgusted look and said bitterly, "Jesus Christ.'' And walked away. Ohhhhh-kay.
2. I went online to order cable/internet/telephone service and found myself in an IM chat with a technical person about the various options for cable sports tiers. The guy wasn't understanding my questions, and so after a while I said, forget it -- if this is the wrong thing I'm ordering, I'll just call and change to what I want. The guy, quite conscientious, wrote back, and I quote, "I am sorry for incontinence cost to you.''
No problem. I'm feeling rather regular, sir. In fact, it was all worth it, because, as column fodder goes, this was a pretty good note.
"Andrew Luck makes it look so easyyyy.''
-- @PrinceAmukamara, the rookie cornerback of the New York Giants, watching Saturday night's triple-overtime Stanford win over USC.
"Andrew Luck looks pretty good out there. He has that Eli look on his face though. It's unassuming. Makes him sneaky good."
-- @RyanRClark, the Pittsburgh safety, also during USC-Stanford.
"You know who doesn't suck? #Luck''
-- @MikeVacc, New York Post columnist Mike Vaccaro, after the game.
"No one is "Tanking the season"... that's absurd conspiracy theory mumblings...Suck4Luck doesn't exist n Indy.''
-- @JimIrsay, the owner of the 0-8 Colts, after another debacle of a loss Sunday in Tennessee.
Phillips: Cox, La Russa, and Torre added to Hall of Fame class
SI Now Live Monday December 9, 2013