You think the greens at Augusta National are hard and quick, try the concrete in Paul Stankowski's garage.
``It was running at a 23 on the Stimpmeter,'' Stankowski joked. ``That's a little fast.''
Stankowski was talking about a 20-minute putting session he had in his garage in Dallas to prepare for the ultra-slick greens at the Masters.
Had Stankowski actually Stimped his garage, the 23 rating would almost definitely be faster than Augusta National. We can't say for sure, because Augusta National doesn't talk about how its greens rate on the Stimpmeter.
The Stimpmeter is a simple, $46 device for measuring the speed of a green. It's a metal ramp about 3 feet long with a chute down the middle and a notch a few inches from the top end. You set the ball in the notch and lift the Stimpmeter until the ball drops and rolls down the chute.
Then you measure how far the ball rolls, and reverse directions and repeat the process. The average length of the roll, in feet, is the Stimp result.
The purpose of the Stimp rating - besides it being fun to say ``Stimp'' - is to find out what sort of maintenance the greens need. Mike Davis, superintendent at Jones Creek Golf Club in Evans, said his staff Stimps the greens every day to see if they are running at the proper speed. At Jones Creek, that's a 9. If the green is too slow, for example, they might mow it again.
Most courses on the PGA Tour rate at about 10. Some players estimate Augusta National would Stimp between 12 and 14. Nick Price guessed slopes such as the one on the left side of the 14th green would likely Stimp at 45 or 50.
Others said it would likely be impossible to perform a true Stimp test at Augusta National. The test has to take place on a flat surface, and on this course they are in short supply.
``If you roll it down one of those little ramps, it goes off the green,'' Davis Love III said. ``The only thing you could do is roll it uphill, but it would probably turn around and go off the green.''
Most players said they prepare for the Masters' greens by practicing on other greens with a lot of break, or simply by mentally reviewing the way the greens have played in past tournaments.
But Stankowski wasn't the only one who thought the National's greens were more like a common household surface than anything found in nature.
Tommy Tolles said he was taking his putter home to practice on the hardwood floors in the house he's renting. He's got a clear stretch of about 30 feet, and he said he was planning on hitting balls across it for an hour Tuesday night.
If players are really looking for the perfect artificial surface, they might call Steve Copley, a sales manager for the golf company Eagle One in Orange, Calif.
Copley, on what must have been a slow day at work, Stimped the hard, indoor-outdoor carpet in his office. It rated at 12 - pretty close to the estimated speed at Augusta National.
Davis, gamely accepting a request, performed the Stimp test on the concrete floor of the cart garage at Jones Creek. It rated at 31.
Memo to Stankowski: Your garage is playing a little slow.