photo by David Coyle
If you think college is all fun and games, well, you got that
right. College is all fun and games--or can be, if you play your
cards right. And you can learn to play your cards right at UNLV,
which offers a course called Mathematics of Casino Games. Which
is not to say that college is all about keno and baccarat. On
the contrary: College is also very much about flag floopball
(football using a Nerf ball), which you can play at Western
Carolina. In fact, at your modern American institution of higher
learning, you can earn a bowling scholarship (Wichita State). Or
take a course in coaching football (Florida). Or compete in an intramural chili cook-off (Boise
State). Or play 36 holes a day on campus (dozens of schools). Or
practically take root in a sports bar called Bubba's II. Or just sit in your dorm room all day and watch ESPN in
your underwear. All of which is why they call it a bachelor's
degree. In short, if you like to play sports, watch sports or
study sports (in preparation for an exciting career in sports);
if you believe that athletic scholarship is a redundancy,
ranking right up there with guidance counselor; if you enjoy the
kind of tailgating, Yale-baiting, cheerleading, beer-bleeding
sports scene that only a college campus can provide, then
college is most certainly for you.
But not just any college will do. You have to attend a Jock
School.
