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| |  | | Bjorn Borg Walter Iooss Jr. | Most men would be looking to get away from their wives during their 24-hour
sports fantasy. Not me. See, my wife is not a sports fan, so when a sporting
event resonates with her, it must be something special. I ask for only two stops
on my fantasy trip, but she must come along ... on one of them, anyway. We will
morning and afternoon at Wimbledon. (In the British dictionary,
"morning" and "afternoon" can be used as verbs; in fact, any
nouns can be used as verbs.) We don't mind queuing up, and a first-week match
will be fine. We did that when we were young, a quarter century ago, and were
captivated by two young athletes named Evonne Goolagong and Bjorn Borg. We were
in the house the year Borg won his first of five straight championships, and
early on in the tournament, after one glimpse of the soulful Swede, my wife
proclaimed, "He's going to win." She has viewed herself as something of
a tennis seer since then, and we always catch a few matches of Wimbledon on the
tube. But we've never gone back; in this fantasy, we will.
If I Concorde (note noun-as-verb usage) back from Wimbledon, I can make it to
Augusta by late afternoon. Augusta, you see, owes me one. In 1999, I got picked
in the journalists' lottery to play the course on Monday, the day after
José Maria Olazábal had won the green jacket. I wasn't ready. I
had worked all night on my Masters story, filed it at 7:15 a.m., and was
standing on the first tee 45 minutes later, groggy and nervous. Not only was I
functioning on zero sleep, but also a course attendant had caught me trying to
make a cell phone call to check on my story. No cells at Augusta, an excellent
rule -- except when your job may hang on a phone call.
Anyway, I started 8, 7, 7 before I got my bearings. The round is a blur, but
here's what I remember: No golf course in the world is as beautiful as Augusta.
Not Pine Valley, not St. Andrews, not Pebble Beach. It's a classic in every
sense of the word and I want another crack at it. This fantasy might be my only
chance.
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