Standing Pat

These are my arguments for not doing the Power Rankings before the camps open:

1) Much too early. I mean, most of the No. 1 picks aren't even signed yet.

2) Doesn't mean anything at this date. And if it doesn't mean anything, why do it?

3) Exposes me to more ridicule than usual.

4) Opens up all the "you said" e-mailers as in, "You said back in July that the Ravens would be 30th, and now look at them, 6-2 at midseason." You can substitute a dozen other names of teams in that sentence. Maybe more.

These are the arguments, as set forth by the people who pay my salary, for doing them now, I mean right now:

1) There are people out there who want them.

Guess who won the argument.

Here then are the preseason, pre-camp, pre-everything Power Rankings, and if you have complaints, stick 'em up your ... I mean address them to Jimmy or somebody:

Dr. Z's Power Rankings
Rank	LW		Team
1	--		New England Patriots In case you haven't heard, they're the defending Super Bowl champs, and on paper they're stronger now than they were last year. Superstars gone via the corporate raiding of free agency, the fate that usually befalls defending champions? None. They didn't have many to begin with, unless you count Drew Bledsoe. Except for Bill Belichick and his personnel guru, Scott Pioli, retiring to breed horses or race Formula One cars, I see no reason why the Pats shouldn't be up there again.
2	--		St. Louis Rams This is getting boring, isn't it? The No. 2 team last year remains at No. 2. But I really don't see anyone with the muscle to knock 'em off their NFC perch. They lost a few guys, picked up a few, but the heart of their team remains the same.
3	--		Pittsburgh Steelers They'll still rush the passer like crazy, although the departure of Earl Holmes will hurt their run defense, but this will be more than adequately covered by the steady improvement of Kordell Stewart, throwing to what is now a big-league set of wideouts.
4	--		Chicago Bears Chris Chandler opens up the offense with the deep ball, running game remains solid, ditto the defense. That's Scenario No. 1. No. 2 has Jim Miller beating out Chandler, vowing to run a more wide-open attack, settling back into a dink-and-dunk lethargy, which means many low-scoring games, closer than they should be.
5	--		San Francisco 49ers Defense will improve, so will QB Jeff Garcia. Do they still favor what is known as the West Coast Offense? Well, sometimes. Here's a funny thing about the West Coast. I saw it on the golf course last weekend at the British Open. Guys were hitting irons off the tee on 440-yard par 4 holes. The West Coast Offense of golf. Play it safe, take no chances, dink-and-dunk and throw no interceptions. This thing is infecting all sports, for goodness sake.
6	--		Denver Broncos Are you back with us, Ed McCaffrey? Do you still have anything left, Shannon Sharpe? If the answer is yes to both of the above, then Brian Griese has receivers to throw to and the whole operation can breathe a sigh of relief. The running game will survive on memory, whether Terrell Davis or Olandis Gary or Mike Anderson or Floyd Little or Billy Joe is carrying the ball.
7	--		Philadelphia Eagles MLB Jeremiah Trotter is gone, replaced by an overweight, over-age Levon Kirkland, or somebody else once two-a-days start. Lots of new DBs arrive to bolster an already strong corps and keep Jim Johnson's blitz package active. On paper, I don't like what happened during their off-season, but Andy Reid has gotten them to within Super Bowl striking distance. The guy knows how to coach.
8	--		Dallas Cowboys A semi-hysterical pick. They finished 5-11 last year, so this is an awfully big jump, considering that their QB is virtually unproven. But they were one of the stars of Draft Weekend 2002, and they picked up a couple of studs in La'Roi Glover and Bryant Westbrook, so who knows? Let's put it this way -- they might make a move this year, and poor old Z doesn't want to be left at the post if they do.
9	--		Oakland Raiders OK, Raiders e-mailers, let's hear it. Let me try to anticipate your screams: What have you got against the Raiders? You're always down on them. You've been consistently wrong about them. You're getting too fat ... go on a diet. Sorry, but when a team lets itself get this old, sooner or later it has to hit the wall. I say they slip a bit this season and crash in '03, unless they seriously rebuild.
10	--		Green Bay Packers I just don't know about this team. Hardy Nickerson at MLB? Possibly, but I doubt it. All three wideouts gone, replaced by Terry Glenn and ??? Their winning tradition puts them in the top 10, but if they slip, I wouldn't be surprised.
11	--		Tennessee Titans I have faith in Jeff Fisher's ability to rebuild a defense. Other than that, I'm going on a hunch. But if the miseries return to plague Eddie George, forget it.
12	--		Tampa Bay Buccaneers Jon Gruden's doing it all by himself, without a guy named Al looking over his shoulder. He'd be better off with Warrick Dunn still in the backfield, but I think the attack will be OK, and the defense really hasn't lost that much. Simeon Rice, at DRE, was much better than people anticipated and I look for him to have a really big year.
13	--		Washington Redskins Yes, the D has that fine linebacking corps, and Steve Spurrier is an interesting new face, but Danny Wuerffel at QB is a situation I'm just not enamored with.
14	--		Atlanta Falcons I liked the enthusiasm here, the new faces (namely the one belonging to Warrick Dunn), the acquisition of wideout Willie Jackson, the new 3-4 defense. Sure, there are some holes to fill, but we're at No. 14 now, not top 10.
15	--		Buffalo Bills The O-linemen are going to have to hold their blocks for a while, but Rob Johnson got 'em used to that. Bledsoe will get the ball deep to Eric Moulds. He'll find Jay Riemersma down the seam. They'll run when they have to. The D-line? Don't ask.
16	--		Miami Dolphins More problems on the defensive line. Half of it is gone. Ricky Williams, their new savior of the running game, is no stranger to the police blotter and Miami isn't exactly the kind of a place where a young man leads a quiet life. There are some good players here, but I don't like the direction in which this club is going.
17	--		New York Jets I like the defense, but when you've got a 38-year-old QB with a history of injuries, you're asking for trouble. And Chad Pennington, the heir apparent to Vince Testaverde's throne, has been invisible. Curtis Martin once again will carry the team; I don't see how they can get away from that.
18	--		Cleveland Browns Free agents were signed to address the run defense. Another one, T Ryan Tucker, was brought in to address the same situation on the other side of the ball, and a runner, William Green, was drafted No. 1 to provide some pop. I could have this team too low. I mean, I know I have it too low. So, the anxious e-mailers ask, why don't you raise them? Linda, why didn't I raise them? She says don't bother her.
19	--		Indianapolis Colts The party line is that Tony Dungy will shape up the defense. (Tony, can you still get out there and cover a slot receiver?) I guess I kind of feel that way, too, and with all that offensive firepower, they'll have to win their share.
20	--		Minnesota Vikings New coach Mike Tice says that Randy Moss will get 40 percent of the team's passes thrown to him. Let's see, last year they threw 495, so if they match that number, then 12.375 per game will go to Randy Baby, and if he catches, say, two-thirds of them, then he's in for a 132-catch season and a trip to intensive care. And that's without a Cris Carter around to take the pressure off him. We print all kinds of nonsense, don't we, without stopping to analyze it? But I do like two defensive line pickups they made, both from Miami, Kenny Mixon and Lorenzo Bromell, plus the acquisition of CB Corey Chavous.
21	--		Cincinnati Bengals They've been a young team for a while. Sooner or later they'll mature. Even with a monumental QB battle between Gus Frerotte and Jon Kitna, even with a bad recent track record, I get a sneaking feeling that they'll inch their way up in the standings. So why aren't they higher? They were 7-9 last year and an upward inch means 8-8, which should have them at the middle of the pack. Gosh, folks, you're going to have to work these things out for yourselves. I can't do everything around here.
22	--		Seattle Seahawks Right, I've been down on them for a while. I don't like their draft. I don't like the fact that they brought Kirkland in to be a savior and cut him a year later. I like their O-line but I'm not sure that they won't miss Ricky Watters' flair out of the backfield.
23	--		New York Giants Here are the names of some of the prospective starters at this stage -- LG Rich Seubert, RG Jason Whittle, RT Chris Bober, FB Charles Stackhouse, FS Omar Stoutmire. You can get by with one or two no-names like these, but not with so many of them all at once. Now watch these guys all have bang-up seasons and send old Z to the showers.
24	--		New Orleans Saints First, there's the wreckage of 2001 to clear away. Then there's the loss of two all-pro linemen, Glover and Joe Johnson. And former all-pro tackle Willie Roaf. And their possession wideout, Willie Jackson. And, of course, Ricky Williams, unless you believe that Deuce McAllister can carry a running game, which I don't. Then their owner stepped in and fired their GM, who'd been lauded for building that fine team of two years ago. Not a healthy situation here.
25	--		Houston Texans No expansion team ever has begun its career with more talent. At least on paper. Will they really be competitive this year? Tell me how Tony Boselli's shoulder will be in September. And DT Gary Walker's groin injury and post-op hernia. We're throwing darts. They could be higher, could be lower, could be right at 25, surprise.
26	--		San Diego Chargers QB situation to resolve, offensive line to revamp, wideouts to fit into place. Everyone thinks their defense will be better. Well, maybe.
27	--		Kansas City Chiefs Good rookie DT in Ryan Sims, tough loss of OLB Donnie Edwards. But we're just playing with names now. I'm not a Trent Green man. Throws too many picks, although new wideout Johnnie Morton should help that situation. Worst of all, their once imposing home-field edge of Arrowhead Stadium went kapoof at 3-5 last year.
28	--		Arizona Cardinals Show me a D-line, show me some LBs, show me a strong safety that can stuff the run as well as Pat Tillman did, then I'll take the Cards seriously.
29	--		Jacksonville Jaguars Now we're in the cap swamp, but you've read this enough (and you'll have to read it again, with Baltimore coming up). To be kind, let's call it a rebuilding year.
30	--		Baltimore Ravens OK, everyone can recite the free-agent lineup that departed. Let's address another issue: Chris Redman at QB. On another team, I might say that this young guy, as untested as he is, might blossom, but look at the recent history. Elvis Grbac last year, Trent Dilfer the year before, Tony Banks and Stoney Case in '99, Jim Harbaugh and Eric Zeier in '98. Gone, all gone. Quick hooks. Oh, they'll win a few via the defense, but honestly, why can other teams find a QB while the Ravens can't?
31	--		Carolina Panthers I'm rooting hard for John Fox, a good guy and a good defensive coach, but one high pick named Julius Peppers isn't going to cure this mess. I don't think Chris Weinke is the QB to lead the Panthers back into ... what? Contention? Respectability? What are they aiming for?
32	--		Detroit Lions Another rooting interest, this time for Matt Millen. Give me credit for not trying to hide my biases. They play hard, they need team speed, they have a young QB named Joey Harrington who'll make things exciting -- if he beats out Mike McMahon.

I just noticed something. This column has taken me longer than usual. Linda, why did this take me so long?

"Because there's one extra team."

Out of the mouths of babes. And I do mean a babe.