Personal struggles
CNN/SI: How is
your personal life? LT: You know what, I take inventory of my
personal life all the time, you know. Am I happy? I think I'm probably
happier now than I've ever been in my life. Not because, I'm getting
older, wiser and more subdued and stuff, but things are coming at a slower
pace, a pace that I can handle. I feel at peace with myself. As far as
mentally, I think I am very strong mentally. Physically, I could use a
little work. Spiritually, I am stronger now than I ever was, and I can see
that I care more. I've always cared about people but I'm more receptive to
people now.
In the past, I've really damaged myself doing for
other people. I mean that's one thing about me, I'll do anything for
anybody, and sometimes that creates a problem. Now, I'm more selective as
far as what I do, and I do worry more about how is, how will others see
this before I do it. You know, in the past, I was like, hey, I'll do it,
regardless. The hell with what anybody says. Of course, that may be one
way a person may live depending on who he is. I'm more conscious about my
surroundings now, as far as what goes on and what, the proper way of doing
things. I am happy with myself, I mean I am pretty well at peace now.
Battling the demons
CNN/SI: Do you
feel like the demons are out of your life? LT: Out of my life?
The demons will always be there. Always. But, you know, you can always
fight demons. There are tools with us to fight demons. And you fight
demons with angels. And people surrounding you, which I call them angels,
different people in your life. I've got some good people in my life now.
I've had some good people in my life before, and wasn't smart enough to
listen to those people. But I have some good people in my life, I am happy
with my life.
I don't have everything that I want in the world, but it's just a want. I
have everything I need in this world and I tell you, my kids, over this
period of trial and tribulation, they've shown me that they love me so much
and that's stronger than anything. And you know there's a lot of times
when I just didn't, when they was growing up, I just didn't put the time
in. It's the little things that make you happy. The demons are still
there, but I got more angels, or good people, or more tools at hand, to
fight those demons, so I don't worry about those demons as much.