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The great juiced-ball conspiracy
Posted: Friday May 19, 2000 07:22 AM
This much we know: More players hit more home runs than ever before. But we don't know why. Why do you think? Go on, say it. I'll wait. I know what you just said: Well, they've juiced up the ball. Everybody says this. Everybody has been saying this forever. It is the most popular conspiracy theory in sport. In fact, even the smartest experts blithely say it. Sports Illustrated just tossed it off last week in its lead editorial, "Take back the plate." Pick up a newspaper, turn on the radio or TV: they're juicing up the ball. May I once again ask a question: Who is juicing the balls up? And another question: How are they doing it? Even the idiotic conspiracy theories about the grassy knoll or Vince Foster's suicide include purported details of how it really was supposed to happen. But for all those people who are so convinced that they juice up the balls, nobody ever tries to explain how they would go about this. I spoke to Sandy Alderson, the commissioner's right-hand man. (I couldn't ask the commissioner himself, because a lot of the conspiracy nuts figure he's the culprit.) Could the owners be the culprits? I asked Sandy. We laughed at the very thought that 30 baseball owners could assemble and conspire, and then all 30 could take the secret to their grave. Could it be the commissioner? Alderson pointed out that, in fact, until this year, the commissioner didn't even have anything to do with the ball. It was in the domain of the league presidents, who would've had to plot together. These guys couldn't even agree on the designated hitter. They were going to conspire to doctor balls made in Costa Rica? Alderson pointed out that since one ball is tested from each lot, that if the commissioner, Bud Selig, was scheming to juice up the balls, he would have to go secretly to Costa Rica, and then not only order the formula changed, but also demand that one ball in each lot be made to the old specifications so that it could pass tests. That's a powerful lot of conspiracy. "Maybe the 'they' is a wildcatter," Alderson suggested, helpfully. "Somebody mysterious who works for Rawlings" -- the company that makes the balls -- "is doing this on a lark." "Or," I replied, "a svengali who, every morning, hypnotizes the women who make the balls in Costa Rica." Well, conspiracy fans, I'm sorry, those are your only choices. Baseballs are not juiced up -- simply because it would be impossible for anybody to do it alone, just as it is impossible for a bunch of people to conspire to do it and keep it a secret. Rather, here are the probable reasons that players hit more home runs nowadays: The parks are smaller and customized to reward power. Striking out is not the stigma it used to be, so all players wail away, trying to hit more home runs. Lighting is better than ever, and, as Alderson points out, vision is so correctable now that everybody can see the ball better. Umpires have, through the years, shrunk the strike zone to the batters' advantage. And, surely most important of all, like other modern athletes, hitters are bigger and stronger than ever. So, of course, are the pitchers, but whereas power hitting is primarily a function of strength, pitching is a learned craft. And there are simply not that many good pitchers who have learned how to pitch well. If you still want to believe that they are secretly juicing up the ball, may I suggest you move to Roswell, N.M. and chat with our high government officials who are sleeping there with beautiful little green aliens. These commentaries, which appear each Wednesday on National Public Radio's Morning Edition, are posted weekly by CNNSI.com. The opinions expressed here are solely those of the writer.
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