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 McGwire-Sosa: Act II, sham I
Posted: Tuesday August 10, 1999 04:08 PM
Where have you gone, Jose Canseco , now that we actually need you? You have let us down before -- the speeding, the Hooters waitress, the homer off your head, the 0-for-important games, the smug cockiness of a young man on the verge of greatness. You never reached greatness, Jose, but ... please ... Jose, please come back. This home run race -- McGwire - Sosa II -- is a joke. Were Ford Frick still in good health, surely his asterisk pen would be uncapped and ready. Frick, the ancient commissioner who considered Roger Maris 's 61 to be as authentic as Sally Struthers , could smell a farce from 10 ballparks away. He would see the present conditions -- the juiced balls (and batters), the dollhouse stadiums, the high aptitudes, the Pat Rapps and Tommy Baldwins and Mike DeJeans and Scott Karls -- clear his throat and offer the truth: "Baseball is sacred," he would say. "This is not sacred." Jose Canseco, you are the one man who could've offered truth. At one point this season, your 31 home runs led baseball. They were 31 of the most insignificant, illegitimate, useless home runs in baseball history. You were wearing the barfadelic uniforms of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. You were playing on turf in a dome in front of 9,001 fans. You were the designated hitter. Were it not for an expansion team needing a DH, you would possibly be over -- a poker game without the chips. But there you were ... Had Jose Canseco not hurt himself near the All-Star break, McGwire-Sosa II would've been McGwire-Sosa-Canseco I. The baseball powers that be, a tight-knit group of old men in suits, would surely find religion. Move to a new country. Pick up badminton. Anything but Jose Canseco, Tampa Bay DH, launching 71 home runs. Anyone who watches a fair amount of the game knows hitting has turned into a foolish, repetitive exercise. Ten seasons ago, Robin Yount won the American League MVP with a .318 average, 21 home runs and 103 RBIs. So for this season Matt Williams (.311-24-93), Jay Bell (.277-28-78), Brian Jordan (.291-19-88), Sosa (.297-42-95), Henry Rodriguez (.337-21-75), Sean Casey (.353-18-65), Larry Walker (.355-30-90), Dante Bichette (.292-22-86), Jeff Bagwell (.310-35-95), Eric Karros (.293-25-67), Jeff Cirillo (.324-10-60), Vladimir Guerrero (.293-23-76), Edgardo Alfonzo (.320-16-72), Mike Piazza (.311-23-76), Robin Ventura (.303-25-90), Bobby Abreu (.341-15-60), Mike Lieberthal (.314-22-69), Scott Rolen (.267-25-67), Kevin Young (.313-16-70), Brian Giles (.308-24-76), Ed Sprague (.289-18-64), McGwire (.279-44-102), Fernando Tatis (.298-24-77), Jeff Kent (.292-13-64), Ellis Burks (.290-19-63) are on pace to wind up with similar, if not better, numbers in the NL, Milwaukee's present home. Because hype is holy, next month McGwire-Sosa II will really heat up. Fans will swarm to St. Looo and Chicago, hoping to catch a ball that'll make 'em overnight millionaires (events to be repeated for the next 10 seasons, unless a Frick comes along to make some changes). In Tampa, poor Jose, nearly back from the DL, will hit his 32nd, 33rd, 34th taters in complete obscurity. Just 9,000 fans, and thoughts of what could've been. Staff writer Jeff Pearlman offers his unique view on baseball every Tuesday during the season for CNNSI.com. The opinions expressed here are solely those of the writer.
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