It's not easy being Green

While following the Detroit Tigers a couple of weeks back, I came across one of the more memorable scenes of my remarkably not-so-memorable sportswriting career. Dmitri Young, the Tigers' loveable first baseman, was sitting in the team's dugout, a jump rope in hand. As several of his teammates began to stretch, Young twisted and turned and knotted the rope, then dangled it over his shoulders. With very few people watching, Young suddenly transformed the cord into a noose. He tied it around his neck, tugged at the end and mocked a hanging.

At the time, Detroit was 0-11.

Since then, the Tigers have heated up. Thanks to horrific defense, laughable starting pitching, a vacant middle of the lineup and -- quite frankly -- sub-Class AAA talent, Detroit now stands at 4-16, only 10 games out in the wacky, wild, woeful AL Central.

Advice to Dmitri. Keep the rope close. It's a loooooooong season.

Pearls of Wisdom

This week, for no particular reason, I devote my five Pearls of Wisdom to former Mariners pitcher Dave Fleming of Mahopac, N.Y.

Fleming No. 1: Shawn Green is hitting all of .220 for the Dodgers and it's not because he misses the calming presence of Terry Adams and Matt Herges. This, from an NL West scout: "It always happens -- when you take a stud player like Gary Sheffield out of a lineup, the other primary run producer struggles. I just saw the Dodgers, and Shawn Green definitely looks a little tentative. A little anxious. He's swinging at some pitches outside of the zone, pitches he probably wouldn't have gone after last season. I'm sure he feels more pressure to produce, so you take swings you normally wouldn't. Brian Jordan is a great clutch hitter, but he's not Sheffield's caliber as a player. He doesn't protect Shawn like Sheff did. But I'll say this about Green: He's a smart player, and he'll figure it out at some point. The tools are still strong."

Fleming No. 2: One of the biggest surprises of the season so far has to be the play of Arizona's Junior Spivey, whose .373 average and league-leading 11 doubles come less than seven months after he was the world champs' forgotten man. Spivey was a nice, scrappy find for the Diamondbacks in 2001, but when crunch time came along, manager Bob Brenly went with Craig Counsell, the playoff-tested second baseman. Spivey remained upbeat, though, pulling for his team -- Counsell, in particular. He deserves his success.

Fleming No. 3: On Wednesday the Blue Jays sent Brian Lesher down to Class AAA Syracuse, marking what seems to be the 2,567th time a major league team has outrighted the outfielder. It's a bizarre thing, considering Lesher has above-average pop, a decent glove and a hard-nosed approach to the game. In 10 minor league seasons, Lesher has batted .285 with 137 home runs. As one GM once told me, "The guy is just a half-step away from being a very good player."

Fleming No. 4: Give Ruben Rivera some credit. Although he was released by the Yankees in spring training after stealing a bat and glove from Derek Jeter's locker and selling them to a memorabilia broker, Rivera has yet to invent an excuse for his actions. "I don't have an answer for why I did it," Rivera, now an outfielder for the Tulsa Drillers, the Texas Rangers' Class AAA affiliate, recently said. "I know it wasn't for the money. I have my own money. I don't even know how I could do that. He was a friend of mine for 11 years."

Fleming No. 5: This month marks the 95th anniversary of the first big-league game in which a catcher dared to wear shin guards in open view. Roger Bresnahan of the New York Giants introduced the innovation in a game against the Philadelphia Phillies. Despite being jeered by the Polo Grounds crowd, Bresnahan's thickly padded protectors eventually became standard issue for backstops. To Mr. Bresnahan, Mike Piazza owes his life.

My Top 5 List of the Week

The five most insignificant famous people I have interviewed as a journalist:

1. Soni, drummer from Hootie & the Blowfish. So insignificant, I don't remember his full name.

2. Matt Suhey, formerChicago Bears fullback. So insignificant, he had no speaking lines in Super Bowl Shuffle.

3. Steve Steinwedel, former University of Delaware basketball coach. So insignificant, he now teaches at Del Tech.

4. Davey Lopes, formerMilwaukeeBrewers manager. So insignificant, he now gives snide, one-word answers to the mirror.

5. Victor Kiam, formerNew EnglandPatriots owner. So insignificant, I don't even hate him anymore for cruelly blowing off a 17-year-old high school journalist (me) looking for a quote on pro football.

Sports Illustrated senior writer Jeff Pearlman covers the baseball beat for the magazine. His Pearls of Wisdom appear every Friday on CNNSI.com. Jeff will answer your inquiries in future editions of Pearls. Click here to send him a question or comment.

 

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