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What about this XFL thing?
Posted: Thursday February 10, 2000 12:25 PM
Subject: the XFL, the pro football league proposed by World Wrestling Federation promoter Vince McMahon. Question: Is this for real? More questions: Can football really be played inside a steel cage, first team to unlock the door wins the game? What will the uniforms be like? Will there be a team of paramilitary neo-Nazi bad guys from, say, New York playing a team of earnest steroid-filled farm boys from, say, Chicago? Will the team from LA be filled with self-absorbed muscle men, admiring their long blonde hair and good looks in a mirror? How many teams will wear masks? Will a folding chair be part of each team's equipment? Eleven folding chairs? Will fire be involved? Power tools? Will the coaches be geeks and braggarts and mysterious characters from who knows where? What, pray tell, will the cheerleaders look like? Will the word "dominatrix" come to mind? Will there be nefarious plots, skullduggery, surrounding every game, quarterbacks attacked in stadium parking lots by thugs wielding axe handles? Will defensive and offensive linemen be battling in a game within the game for the hand of some famous porn queen? Will Vince's children be involved in the plot? Will there be titles for everyone, every week a championship belt on the line? Will the introductions take longer than the games, everyone posturing and grabbing the microphone to promise what mayhem they are going to commit? Will there be little junior high school slogans, touches of bathroom humor to appeal to the simplest minds? Will there be.... Final question: Will these guys go out into the community, too, and work for the United Way? Sports Illustrated senior writer Leigh Montville appears regularly on CNN/Sports Illustrated. The opinions expressed here are solely those of the writer.
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