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Playoff calculations with Phil Simms
Week 16 Awards | Factoid
... Click here to send a question to Peter King's NFL Mailbag. SOMEWHERE OVER VIRGINIA ON CONTINENTAL 1029 -- Shhh. It's 2:08 Monday morning. And Phil Simms is sleeping in the seat next to me. We've just spent 90 minutes going over everything remotely to do with the playoffs, and it ended with Simms, a CBS game analyst, saying, "Can you believe what a great weekend next weekend is gonna be, with everyone jockeying for position? I can't wait." We both covered the Colts' 20-13 win at Miami. We both sat in Fort Lauderdale International Airport for a couple of hours, waiting for our weather-delayed flight to leave for Newark, bemoaning how the place didn't have cable TV (What is this? The 19th century?), forcing us to miss the Giants' NFC East-clinching and apparently quite ugly win against Dallas. We both then tried to figure out all the permutations of the playoff scene, which got incredibly complex because of all the contenders who were supposed to win this weekend lost.
It really was a heck of a weekend. What pro football has over every other sport is the ability, for several hours on a few Sundays every season, to hold people hostage. Particularly now in the DirecTV era. This was one of those weekends. Seattle stuns Oakland (and stop blaming the ruling, Raiderphiles, that Marquez Pope rolled into the end zone). Brett Favre slays his Metrodome demons and shocks the Vikes. Denver gets frozen out in Kansas City. The Double-A Bengals surprise the Jags. And the Jets, those incredible shrinking Jets, come up small at home against the Lions. All that before the Sunday late games. In the first quarter of the Horse-Fish game at Pro Player, I sat in my press box seat next to ESPN's John Clayton, with The Boston Globe's Ron Borges and John McClain of the Houston Chronicle over our shoulders. We'd been watching three of the 1 o'clock games finish on the TVs in front of us, and with the local game starting, the sets had to be tuned to the game in front of us, so everyone would be able to get good views of replays. But we implored Dolphins p.r. man Seth Levin to continue showing the New England-Buffalo game on one of the monitors. Meaningless game, of course. But we couldn't take our eyes off such a visually stunning game. It looked like it was being played in Siberia. Dark, gale-force winds, snow blowing sideways, Wade Phillips' eyebrows literally frozen over. It was 10-10 late in the fourth quarter, and we couldn't look away. With 31 seconds left, Drew Bledsoe threw consecutive 19-yard strikes to an ice-skating Terry Glenn. Then he threw another to someone whose number was obliterated by the weather, and with one second remaining New England had the ball at the Buffalo 10. Timeout. Here comes Adam Vinatieri. From 27 yards, it's a chippy, right? Wrong. There's a wind gusting up to 40 mph. Holder Lee Johnson bobbles the snap, Vinatieri kicks a duck wide left, and we go to overtime. (Later, I'm describing this scene to Peyton Manning, and, like some football freak who'd missed the big game, he said: "Drew really had it going, huh? I can't wait to see that one on the highlights.") In overtime, Doug Flutie looks like he's back in the Canadian Football League, driving the Bills to what looks like a win, and in the press box we're riveted to the TV. Second-and-19 from the Bills' 19: Flutie to Shawn Bryson for 18 yards. A minute later, a scrambling Flutie to Eric Moulds for seven. The Colts-Dolphins game is going on in front of us, but we can't look away. "You know what's so interesting about Flutie?" said Flutiephile Borges. "Here we are, covering an important game, with real meaning. And Doug Flutie forces us to watch a totally meaningless game." Flutie slashes and throws the Bills to the New England 12. There he stalls. And of course, the Steve Christie field goal is blocked. "Let Flutie kick it," Borges says. "He kicked in high school, you know." And now Bledsoe, into the teeth of a wind, brings New England down the field. Valor seeps from Bledsoe on the drive. On a couple of occasions he has to lean forward because it looks like he's going to be blown down. And he gets the Pats in position for the chippy field goal, and this time Vinatieri doesn't miss. Pats win! Pats win! It's Sundays such as these that make me wish for the occasional day off, so I could sit in front of a bank of TVs to get mesmerized for six hours. Back to the plane. Simms and I are deciphering the playoff picture in seats 5C and 5D. I have the expanded standings and every team's game-by-game results. "Can Tampa win the division?" I say. "Is there any way?" He gets out his tiebreaker sheet and we figure what happens if the Bucs and Vikes end up 11-5, which is a big if. Tampa Bay would have to win against St. Louis Monday night and Green Bay -- at the Tundra -- next Sunday. Minnesota would have to lose at Indy next Sunday. "Head-to-head's number one," he says. "They split," I say. "Division record," he says. "Both would be 5-3," I say. "Conference record," he says. "Hang on," I say, figuring. "Both would be 8-4." "OK now. Common opponents," he says. I get to figuring. I'm not that quick. "Tampa 5-0, Vikes 4-1." "Wow," Simms says, somewhere over Georgia. "Can you believe that? Minnesota could still get the fourth seed." "And the Giants," I say, "clinch home-field by beating Jacksonville on Saturday." "You know what's great?" he asks. "I got that game. And then Sunday, I'm just going to sit back with the clicker in my hand, watching it all." Two kids. Talking playoffs. Week 16 AwardsOFFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE WEEK: San Francisco WR Terrell Owens. How bizarre. At Jerry Rice's last home game as a Niner, another receiver sets the all-time NFL record with 20 receptions in one game, in the 49ers' 17-0 wipeout of the Bears. Did someone say, "Changing of the guard?" Twenty catches for 283 yards. That's a month's worth of work, even in today's pass-happy game. DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE WEEK: Kansas City DE Eric Hicks. Admit it. You've -- a. never; b. barely -- heard of this man. But his 13th sack of the season in a minus-15 wind chill at Arrowhead Stadium stopped the Broncos' second drive of the day and handed Kansas City valuable early momentum, and his 14th sack stunted another drive. Hicks, by far this disappointing team's MVP this year, is one of the bright young pass-rushers in the league, and he helped harass Denver into a 225-yard passing day, unusually feeble for the Broncos. SPECIAL TEAMS PLAYER OF THE WEEK: Pittsburgh PR/CB Hank Poteat, whose 53-yard punt return for touchdown -- the longest punt return by a Steeler for a score in the 31-year history of Three Rivers Stadium, in the last sports event there -- broke open the game against the Redskins Saturday. Pittsburgh's 24-3 win was poetic justice. Or Poteatic justice. COACH OF THE WEEK: (tie) San Francisco head coach Steve Mariucci and San Francisco defensive coordinator Jim Mora Jr. All I know is this: When I was at Niners training camp in late July, Mariucci and Mora were rolling their eyes when I asked how bad it was going to be around Ninerville this year. Well, they started six rookies on defense Sunday and shut out the Bears. Mooch has them 6-9. If San Francisco has a good draft next April, this team actually may never hit rock bottom, the way we all thought it would. And I don't just mean we, as in me. I mean we, as in everyone in and out of the organization. Heck of a job, holding the Bears to 104 total yards. Factoid of the Week That May Interest Only MeAt 2:18 and 38 seconds Sunday afternoon, the Packers-Vikings game and the Broncos-Chiefs game simultaneously reached the two-minute warning of the first half. The 10 Things I Think I Think1. I think Dick LeBeau won himself a job Sunday in Cincinnati, holding the Jags to two touchdowns and Fred Taylor to 3.4 yards per rush. 2. I think things aren't looking so hot for Chris Palmer in Cleveland. VP Dwight Clark wants him out, and Carmen Policy is leaning that way. If Palmer goes, look for Gary Kubiak and Mike McCarthy -- offensive coordinators of the Broncos and Saints, respectively -- to get looks. 3a. I think I've been interested to hear and read the football journalists of America -- and Chargers president Dean Spanos himself -- bash my week-old story that Spanos is using Jimmy Johnson as a consultant for the rebuilding of the Chargers. And then I hear Spanos consulted with Johnson again this week, this time in person. I'm sure they're just talking about old Deano's fantasy team. Or having an innocent lunch, discussing life in the Keys and nothing about football. My point: What's the purpose of bashing a true story, men? b. I think Ryan Leaf has one game left as a Bolt. 4. I think I wonder this: Since when did Daniel Snyder and Bernard Shaw get to be such buddies? I thought the Steelers-Redskins tilt was a CNN telecast for a while, with all the shots of Shaw in the Washington owner's box. 5. I think these non-football thoughts: a. Saturday Night Live is funnier this year than in any season since the Belushi era. If you didn't see the Jeopardy! skit, with Lucy Liu playing Catherine Zeta-Jones, you must get a tape of it. Immediately. b. Coffeenerdness: I am sick of the inconsistency of Starbucks. You pay $3.65 for a grande hazelnut latte and you'd expect the same quality from drink to drink. You get a wide disparity. A couple more bad ones, and I'm going to throw open my office window and yell: "I'm mad as hell and I'm not gonna take it anymore!" c. CNN/SI buddy Josie Karp asked me Sunday morning during a staff brunch at a diner in Miramar, not far from Pro Player, "I want to get into your Monday Morning Quarterback. How can I get in?" You just did. My favorite menu item: Waffle with scoop of ice cream ... $3.75. d. Nice move by Simms, buying eight pizzas and five boxes of wings for everyone in the airport bar. You get points for that one, Phil. 6. I think whoever picks up Flutie in 2001 -- after the Bills waive him, of course -- will be a very, very happy team. The man can play. 7. I think if I were Michael Vick, I would enter the 2001 NFL draft. No question. Why? Because in 2002, I'm going to be the first pick of the Houston Texans. And the rookie quarterback of an expansion team (Kerry Collins, Tim Couch) will get beat up consistently and lose even more consistently. Now, let's say Vick comes out this year, and San Diego has the first pick. You have two choices if you're Vick. One, force a trade, hopefully to a team that can protect you; San Diego wants volume out of the pick, and a bunch of teams would give volume for Vick. Two, stay in San Diego and play for a good quarterbacks coach, Mike Riley, for at least one year. I just don't think Virginia Tech is enough of a pro-style offense to teach Vick the ropes for the next level. 8. I think I agree with Denver linebacker John Mobley, who said after the porous Broncos' run defense gave Kansas City fullback Tony Richardson a career-high 156-yard day: "For him to get 100 against us is pretty sad." If 100 is sad, what is 156, John? 9. I think if I were John Hall I'd start to pack up the things in my apartment on Long Island. 10. I think of all the weird things that have happened this year -- the rebirth of the Saints, the death of the Redskins, the ascension of Mike Anderson -- the weirdest is this one sentence: The Giants clinch home-field in the NFC by beating Jacksonville on Saturday. Wow. Sports Illustrated senior writer Peter King covers the NFL and appears
regularly on CNN/Sports Illustrated and CNN's NFL Preview. Click here to send a
question to his NFL Mailbag.
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