 |
| |
|
 |
 |
Distorted image Sprewell's mishap paints odd picture of today's "bad boy"Posted: Monday October 14, 2002 11:41 AMUpdated: Monday October 14, 2002 1:24 PM
If you're like me, when you heard that New York Knicks star Latrell Sprewell's broken hand may have been the result of throwing an errant punch on his yacht, the first question that popped into your head wasn't "When will Sprewell learn to control that violent temper of his?" It wasn't "Were the Knicks right to fine him $250,000 for not reporting the injury to them immediately?" It wasn't "Does this mean Sprewell is going to be traded?" It was this: Spree got a yacht? Since when did one of the hippest, baddest men in professional sports become Thurston B. Howell III? If Sprewell wants to take to the water, a sleek power boat or maybe a speedy jet ski would at least allow him to maintain his street cred. But a yacht? A yacht conjures up visions of the Knicks forward sporting deck shoes with no socks, white pants, and a blue double-breasted blazer with the family crest on the pocket, his cornrows poking out from beneath his jaunty white captain's hat. It's not exactly what the well-dressed anti-hero is wearing this season. A yacht? Even P.J. Carlesimo must have snickered to himself when he heard that one. Richard Pryor used to say that cocaine was God's way of telling you that you were making too much money. Apparently God is sending that message by way of luxury boat these days, because when supposed rebels like Sprewell stop spending their cash on sports cars and trips to Vegas and start taking to the high seas, talking about fore and aft instead of frontcourt and backcourt, they're obviously running out of new toys to buy with their millions. As if it's not disillusioning enough to learn that Sprewell owns a yacht, now we have to deal with the slapstick image of him allegedly swinging at one of his passengers, punching the wall instead and then shaking his hand in pain. See what a yacht does to a man? You can bet that before he became a seafarer, Sprewell would have broken his hand on the person's jaw, the way any self-respecting bad boy should. He certainly didn't miss Carlesimo's neck a few years ago, pre-yacht. It's not as though Sprewell is the first athlete to injure himself in an embarrassing way. Just this year, we've seen San Francisco Giants second baseman Jeff Kent break his wrist while washing his truck (at least that's his story, and he's sticking to it), and Denver Broncos quarterback Brian Griese sprain his ankle while tripping over his dog. (Teammate Shannon Sharpe was so stunned by the preposterousness of Griese's injury that when told about it he responded, "You jivin' me," marking the first time anyone has heard "jivin'" used in a sentence since The Jeffersons went off the air.) Those injuries may have been clumsier than Sprewell's, but their venues weren't nearly as surprising. Sprewell's yacht suggests that maybe the guys we thought were intimidating aren't so tough after all, that monster paychecks can smooth even the roughest edges. The next thing we know, Allen Iverson will be spending his summers playing tennis in the Hamptons with Biff and Muffy. It is certainly Sprewell's prerogative to become a yachtsman if he so chooses. Who knows? He might be the next great hope for the U.S. in the America's Cup. One word of advice though: If Spree wants to delve into such highfalutin pursuits, he's going to have to learn how to delegate. If he wants to punch someone on his yacht, he should leave it to a member of his posse -- or, should we say, his crew. Sports Illustrated senior writer Phil Taylor writes about a Hot Button issue every Monday on CNNSI.com |
