We rank 'em. You react. That's how the Daily List rolls.
11/28/2007 01:44:00 PM
Five Worst NFL Teams
Will Cam Cameron make history in his first season as a head coach?
By Arash Markazi, SI.com
Watching the Miami Dolphins slip and slide to a 0-11 record on Monday night, finding new and exciting ways to lose -- they've lost six games by three points including this week's stellar 3-0 loss to the Steelers -- it finally hit us that we could be watching history. There's a good chance that the Dolphins could be the first NFL team in more than 30 years to go winless. In our book, it's an accomplishment almost as hard as going undefeated. Hey, if it was easy don't you think someone would have done it over the past three decades?
Before we anoint the Dolphins as the worst team ever lets review our five worst teams in NFL history.
1. 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-14): They are the benchmark of ineptitude for any mediocre team with aspirations of going winless. The last team to play an entire NFL season without a win was the expansion Bucs, who averaged fewer than nine points per game with a quarterback (Steve Spurrier) who threw only seven touchdowns all season. They get extra credit for losing the first 12 games of the 1977 season.
2. 1980 New Orleans Saints (1-15): Who could forgive the "Aints," with fans coming to games with paper bags over their heads after the teams started the season 0-14. The only thing sadder than watching Archie Manning waste away in the Superdome was that their leading rusher, Jimmy Rogers, ran for 366 all season.
3. 2001 Carolina Panthers (1-15): The most deceiving bad team in league history. The Panthers started the season with a 24-13 win over the Vikings and then proceeded to lose an NFL record 15 straight games. The offense scored seven or fewer points in five games. Not surprisingly, George Seifert was fired as the team's coach less than 24 hours after the season finale.
4. 1991 Indianapolis Colts (1-15): If the Colts hadn't snuck out a one-point win against the Jets in Week 11, they'd be at the top of this list. They set league record for fewest points (143), touchdowns (14) and had one of the worst defenses, giving up 381 points. Things got so bad that Eric Dickerson said that he wouldn't even pay to watch the team play if he were a fan.
5. 1990 New England Patriots: Yes, there was a time when the Pats weren't beating everyone by 35 points. Not too long ago they were actually on the other end of the beatings. New England had the worst offense and the second worst defense in the league in 1990 and went winless at home. After a 2-point win against the Colts in Week 2 they lost the last 14 games of the season. They would lose their first nine games the following season, going 2-14 and proving that their mediocrity was no fluke.
Did we miss anyway? What are some of the worst teams you've ever seen?
Marv Albert is at the top of the play-by-play game.
Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images
By Lang Whitaker, SI.com
The downside: I was stuck in a car all day Saturday, which meant I missed the broadcast of the always crucial Georgia/Georgia Tech football game. The upside: I got to listen to the game on the radio, which meant I was able to listen to the venerable Larry Munson call the game. Munson may be 85 years old, but with his gravely voice and knack for turning a phrase, in many ways it was like HDTV on the radio. National telecasts are now broadcast with millions of cameras and more flashy graphics than a video game, but it's rare to still find an announcer who raises the game. Here are my five favorite national play-by-play announcers...
1. Marv Albert:Yes! And it counts! The longtime voice of the NBA on TNT continues to be the best in the business. He knows when to be understated, when to raise his voice, when to crack a joke and, most importantly, when to shut up.
2. Verne Lundquist: He might stumble over a fact every now and then, but Verne calling the SEC on CBS is perfect. Now if we could only get Todd Blackledge back to do the Aflac trivia questions.
3. Jon Miller: His partner, Joe Morgan, has become a magnet for very funny online criticism, but Miller does a fine job calling the action. He earns points for making an effort to pronounce everyone's last name correctly.
4. Mike Breen: ESPN/ABC's lead announcer always seems to realize that the game is bigger than he is, which is something a lot of announcers just can't grasp.
5. Max Bretos: Who? The Fox Soccer Channel talker is an acquired taste, but I love the enthusiasm he brings to even the most arcane match-ups from around the world.
Who are your favorite play-by-play announcers? Let us know below...
Lang Whitaker is the executive editor of SLAM magazine and writes daily at SLAMonline.com