How many basketballs would it take to match the combined weight of the Los Angeles Clippers' Stanley Roberts and John (Hot Plate) Williams?
About 430. Though the Clips do not make daily weight reports public, the best guess is that Roberts and Williams check in at about 300 pounds each. That's much worse news for Williams, who is 6'9" and theoretically a mobile player, than it is for the 7-foot Roberts. At any rate, Stanley is definitely the man in the middle for the Clips, and, foul trouble notwithstanding, he has had at least an average preseason. Williams just began full-court drills last week and is not expected to be a factor until midseason. If he begins nocturnal missions to the golden arches, he will not be a factor at all.
Regarding the Denver Nuggets, why is Mark Macon, who is supposed to be a shooting guard, starting at the point? And why is Chris Jackson, who is supposed to be a point guard, playing at the two?
It has more to do with deficiencies than strengths. Macon (.375 shooting percentage last year) doesn't shoot well enough to be a true off-guard, and his shot selection last season, according to first-year coach Dan Issel, "was, quite frankly, horrendous." Jackson, meanwhile, simply doesn't have the court sense to be a fulltime quarterback, though he will play the position from time to time. At any rate, look for Macon to have much more defensive responsibility than most playmakers—in truth, it remains to be seen if he can handle the point. Jackson, who is 25 pounds lighter than he was at this point last season, will be battling Todd Lichti, an improved Reggie Williams and rookie Bryant Stith for minutes.
What is the net result of the Minnesota Timberwolves' adding Chuck Person?
They now have two of the most obnoxious players in the league. All right, that's not fair—rookie forward Christian Laettner has yet to prove that he can irritate with the big boys. But I'm betting on him. What is the coachspeak explanation of Person's departure from Indy? "Our team had a tough time dealing with his strong personality," said Pacer coach Bob Hill. Is that the same thing as saying, "They hated the sonofagun"?
Is Laettner the worst 1992 Olympian in the NBA?
Not even close. Two of Laettner's teammates, Australia's Luc Longley and the Unified Team's Gundars Vetra, have him beat with ease. Laettner, in fact, will be an outstanding pro—perhaps not a superstar along the lines of O'Neal, but a future All-Star.
Will the Dallas Mavericks he the worst team you've ever seen?
It depends on how old you are. The worst record in NBA history was posted by the 1972-73 Philadelphia 76ers, who went 9-73. The Mavericks won't be that bad. The 1947-48 Providence Steamrollers didn't steamroll anybody en route to a 6-42 record in a merciful 48-game schedule. The Mavericks won't be that bad. The third-worst team of all time was the 1986-87 Clippers, at 12-70. The Mavericks won't be that bad. In its first season (1988-89), Miami lurched out of the blocks with 17 straight losses and went on to a 15-67 record. The Mavericks just might be that bad.