How to make a subpoena colada:
Take McCarver, then just add ice wada.
Though Deion was rude,
Timmy never sued.
Hey, McCarver, I still think you oughta.
Why in the name of Jehovah,
Did Connors play Navratilova?
A thoracic disk
Put Gretzky at risk,
And Bonds was rolling in clova.
When football's Plan B was illegalized,
Keith Jackson was quickly il-Eagleized.
Baseball's Giants stayed put,
But they rendered kaput
Roger Craig and his sad, baggy beagle eyes.
May the New Year erase all your cares.
May you ever be sunny, and share
All that you've got
With those who have not
And keep Dennis Byrd in your prayers.