Since belle became a big league regular in 1991, he has hit more homers (313) and driven in more runs (979) than any other player. He has also batted an even .300. I'll take some of that poison in my locker room anytime. Belle may snarl at the press and move aloofly through the clubhouse, but teammates don't have to love him to be carried by him. Besides, with Belle on your team, you'll always be able to proudly say, "Our cleanup hitter can kick your cleanup hitter's ass."
Sure, he swings a mean stick (even when there's no cork in it), but in his two seasons with the White Sox, Belle was MIA in April, helping to bury Chicago in a hole it couldn't get out of. He's also a suspect fielder, occasionally handling flies as miserably as he handled Hannah Storm's interview request. A team would be wise to save itself headaches—and the cost of clubhouse plumbing repairs—by spending its millions on fan-friendlier Bernie Williams.