Bill Russell, who had all the warmth and charm of a New Jersey DMV clerk.
Best Number on a Uni
The ? of minor league ballplayer John Neves, who wore it for what his name spells backward.
Best Blockbuster Trade
New York Yankees pitcher Fritz Peterson's October 1972 swapping of his wife and kids for those of fellow Yanks pitcher Mike Kekich.
Kekich's, because Peterson's wife and kids were gone by the '73 season.
Cornell football coach Carl Snavely's decision to give back his undefeated 1940 team's victory over Dartmouth when films proved the Big Red won on an illegal "fifth" down.
Colorado football coach Bill McCartney's refusal to give back his team's 1990 victory over Missouri when films proved the eventual national champion Buffaloes won on an illegal "fifth" down.
To Don Larsen, after his 1956 World Series perfect game: "Is it the best game you've ever pitched?"
From Otis Armstrong, Denver Broncos halfback in the '70s, on his team's future: "We've got our backs to the driver's seat."
Best Line Anybody Ever Wrote
Jim Murray, Los Angeles Times, about the Indy 500, in the 1960s: "Gentlemen, start your coffins."