The Dice (and The Players) Are Loaded

Hey, kids, is America's hottest new board game on your holiday list? It's called Sorry! (NFL Edition), and it lets you live the life of a high-priced, irresponsible NFL megastar! Be the first in your posse to get it!

START

Roll one die to see if you will finish college, as you promised Mom, or declare for the draft. (Any number: Declare)

Sorry! Your bathroom suitemate at camp is bacteria-rich placekicker Sebastian Janikowski. (Lose a turn)

Hottie believes you graduated from Electoral College, agrees to hand inspection. (Roll again)

Roll the die to see how many states you'll have to visit on Father's Day.

Sorry! You're a receiver and you just got drafted by Pittsburgh. (Lose career)

New NFL buddies invite you to go clubbin'. Don't realize you need actual club. (call HMO)

Payday. Collect $76 million. (Threaten holdout)

It suddenly hits you that your paycheck isn't Monopoly money. (Roll again)