Televised sports are in full swing, which means you're subjecting yourself to high levels of toxically bad commercials. We've identified the worst offenders:
Terry Bradshaw and Doug Flutie for 10-10-220. In this phone service ad, Flutie and Bradshaw—who plies his good ol' boy shriek to the hilt—peer curiously at a piece of sushi. "Where I'm from, we call that stuff bait," says Bradshaw. Where would that be, Terry? The 1950s?
Michael Jordan and his caddie for Gatorade. Let's imagine the creative meeting for this spot: "So Jordan's on a golf course, and he's being pestered by this incredibly annoying caddie, who goes on about how cool it is to drink Gatorade. Did we mention how incredibly annoying he'll be?"
Howie Long and Teri Hatcher for Radio Shack. The electronics giant says this aggravatingly cloying duo will be a big presence during the Super Bowl pregame show. Don't say we didn't warn you.
Jason Sehorn and Shannon Sharpe for Charles Schwab. Granted, some of the spots in the investment firm's Smarter Investors series are entertaining: Dikembe Mutombo at a shareholders meeting, for instance. But watching Sehorn mock-criticize Sharpe for his trash-talking ways reminds us that Mr. Angie Harmon is only the second-best actor in his family.