1. Call it the old-fashioned way. Too often referees whistle the triggerman for a charge on the fast break, or a hustling big man for going over the top on the offensive boards, or a player for setting a screen 25 feet from the hoop. "If they interpreted the rules the way they used to [in the 1980s]," says Hornets G.M. Bob Bass, "each team might pick up close to 20 points a game."
Odds it will be done: even money
2. Punish owners for their sins. When the Timberwolves violate salary-cap rules by signing Joe Smith under the table, fine the hell out of their front office but don't take it out on their supporters by docking the team four future first-round draft picks. That would be only one way to avoid constantly reminding fans that this is a billion-dollar business run by lawyers and accountants.
Odds it will be done: 2 to 1
3. Recast the All-Star Game. Want to see both teams take pride in winning while entertaining the fans? Make it the Thirties (players 30 and older) versus the Twenties (those 29 and younger). This will instantly become the most talked-about midseason diversion in any sport.
Odds it will be done: 200 to 1
4. Make Donald Sterling an offer he can't refuse. If the Clippers' penurious owner were persuaded to sell, the team's rivalry with the Lakers could blossom into a modern-day Dodgers versus Yankees. With no NFL team in Los Angeles, the NBA could take control of the nation's entertainment capital.
Odds it will be done: 1,000 to 1
5. Move the coaches to the cheap seats. Let coaches be in charge at practices, before the game and during halftime. When play begins, move them upstairs, leaving captains to run the team during timeouts. Give the players real responsibility and they might even behave more responsibly.
Odds it will be done: 100,000 to 1