SIGN OF THE SPRING
Please do not annoy, torment, pester, plague, molest, worry, badger, harry, harass, heckle, persecute, irk, bullyrag, vex, disquiet, grate, beset, bother, tease, nettle, tantalize or ruffle the animal.
Wild Animal Park
Over Kirk Gibson's locker, courtesy of Dan Petry, who obtained it from the San Diego Wild Animal Park.
THEY BUILT THIS CITY ON ROCK-'N'-ROLL
(It certainly wasn't baseball.)
The Giants' infield of Will Clark, Rob Thompson, Jose (Don't Call Me Gonzalez) Uribe and Chris Brown averages 24 years of age and 77 games of experience. One NL scout calls the Thompson-Uribe double-play combination "Webster's future definition of 'mediocrity.' " When Brown—who has a reputation for hypochondria—was struck in the face by a ground ball and rolled on the field in apparent distress, a teammate sidled up to Glenn Schwarz of the San Francisco Examiner and cracked, "A fly must have landed on his neck."
TAGS OF THE SPRING
Sammy (Frank Zappa) Khalifa of the Pirates, for his spacey nature. Runner-up: Darrel (Kool FM) Akerfelds of the A's, so named for his 94.5 earned run average.
QUOTES OF THE SPRING
?"It doesn't matter if his shoulder's sore. He doesn't throw anyone out anyway."—Sparky Anderson on Kirk Gibson, who had one assist in 298 chances last year.
?"I'll probably go work in a casino [in Puerto Rico] like my father and be a dealer. Right now I feel like if a guy like Buddy Biancalana can beat me out of a job at shortstop, I can't play no more."—Shortstop Onix Concepcion, released by Kansas City.