A Personalized History Of Scottish Golf Or You'll Not Do That Here, Laddie

II Your Tee must be upon the Ground.

(Nothing like teeing up the ball in the air for greater distance.)

III You are not to Change the Ball which you Strike off the Tee.

(The caddies will take care of this. When I tried to put down a clean one to putt the other day at St. Andrews, my man, Ginger Johnson, tugged at the sleeve of my cashmere and said, "You'll not do that here, Laddie.")

IV You are not to Remove Stones, Bones or any Break-club for the Sake of playing your Ball Except upon the fair Green, and that only within a Club's Length of your Ball.

(Well, we'll get some pretty tricky breaks over the stones and bones.)

V If your Ball come among Water, or any Watery filth, You are at Liberty to take out Your Ball, & bringing it behind the hazard, and teeing it, You may play it with any Club, and allow your Adversary a Stroke, for so getting out your Ball.

(Unless your Adversary doesn't see you do it.)

VII At holeing, You are to play your Ball honestly for the Hole, and not to play upon your Adversary's Ball, not lying in your way to the Hole.

(I heard about this across the ocean in a place called Easthampton. They call it croquet.)