Well, boys, the old National Open comes up again next week out there in Minnesota or somewhere—at one of those new clubs with a name like a shampoo. Hazenwhirl or Hazelrub. I forget. Oh, yeah—Hazeltine. Tough course, they say. Blind shots and all. And more doglegs than you'd ever find in a Viet Cong supper. Heh, heh. Well, whatever happens out there, it won't equal the last Open we had here. Remember? By God, that was what you call a real National Open. Had everybody in it—Hogan, Snead, Zilch, Sausage, Marr, everybody—right down to the last few holes. You know who should have won it, don't you? Old Pete Zilch, that's who. Why he had the whole store locked up if he just plays even bogey over the last three. But, of course, he goes six, six, six. Actually, a lot of us thought he deserved a free drop from the hamburger buns on 16 but Joe Dey said play it. We also thought he might have got a free drop from that lady's beehive hairdo on 17 but old Joe said play that one, too. And then, of course, there was nothing anybody could do to help him on 18 when he picked up the bunker rake and chased Joe into the woods. It's two strokes, you know, to ground your rake in a USGA official. Heh, heh. Another little joke there. Well, anyhow, that was some Open, boys, and I'll surely drink to it if we can get a waiter on his feet.
"There've been a lot of interesting Opens."
What's that, pal? You talking to me?
"I couldn't help overhearing your conversation and I said that the Open has had a lot of fascinating things happen over the years."
Yeah, well, the USGA would be delighted you think so. You a member here, or somebody's guest, or what?
"For example, do you know what's distinctive about the Open returning to the Minneapolis area after 40 years?"
Well, friend, I don't know who you are, but there aren't many of us who follow golf who don't know that Bobby Jones won the Open at Interlachen back in 1930, the year of the Grand Slam.
"That wasn't what I meant. It's the amateur thing."
"Amateurs have won both of the previous Opens that have been played in Minneapolis. Before Jones there was Chick Evans, who won at Minikahda back in 1916. To carry the idea further, Jones won the Amateur at Minikahda in '27, and, of course, Jack Nicklaus won the Trans-Miss at Woodhill in Minneapolis in 1959. It seems that everything that happens in Minneapolis having to do with golf involves amateurs. I think that's interesting."