SI Vault
December 21, 1970
Sir Francis Chichester is to sail out of Plymouth again this week, hoping to smash speed records by covering the 4,000 miles between Portuguese Guinea and San Juan del Norte, Nicaragua in 20 days. He has stowed six bottles of brandy and two of champagne to celebrate Christmas. A speed record is not all that is going to be smashed.
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December 21, 1970


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And Representative James Fulton of Pennsylvania is a walking nut. Carries this pedometer on his belt while walking around and around the Rayburn Building and claims he clicks off 25 to 30 miles a week. Last time he got in to see the President he insisted on giving him a pedometer for his belt, too. And that's probably the last time he'll get in to see the President.

And one must not forget Illinois Representative Kenneth Gray. He keeps in fine shape by flying his brand-new helicopter. But it is not all one gay, mad whirl. He had to make a forced landing in a pasture. He went for help and came back to find his nice new copter surrounded by cows. They had licked off all the paint.

A special yuletide toast to:

Anne Hayes, otherwise known as Mrs. Woody, who appeared with Ohio State's big daddy on a Columbus TV show. "I was approached three times by people asking me if I was going to get a divorce," said Anne. "That's not true. Just because Woody hasn't been home since August is no sign we don't get along. Now the season is over, I'm going to keep him for another year." To which Woody growled, blushingly, "Awww, she just wants to go to the Rose Bowl game."

Some added starters on television's Sesame Street team for 1971 will be Ed Kranepool and Art Shamsky of the Mets and Mike Riordan, Dick Barnett and Walt Frazier of the Knicks. The boys will be teaching kids to count from one to 10 and even beyond, and none of them, please note, is a boxer. Tactful, those Sesame Street people.

Meanwhile, the season's BAH, HUMBUG! Awards go to:

England's Angus Primrose, who learned that Prime Minister Edward Heath has commissioned the New York firm of Sparkman & Stephens to design his new yacht. Said Primrose: "It's absolutely ludicrous. Britain has always been able to build good boats." Primrose designs yachts, by the way.

To Pete Rozelle, who has banned the use of those festive air horns to salute touchdowns at NFL games. For eight years now retired Baltimore cop Leroy Moody has been tootling his horn at Memorial Stadium, and he says everybody likes it, even Spiro Agnew, who said so himself the time that he sat behind Leroy at a game. But Rozelle sent a letter to the Colts, and they sent security guards around to Leroy (that's Section 7, Row 22, Seat 7) to tell him one more time and they'd take his horn away.

To British Major Gerald Gundry, who convinced the R.A.F. Red Arrows aerobatic team to go fly somewhere else besides over Kemble, Gloucestershire during the Duke of Beaufort's fox hunts. Until Gundry got into the act, the howl of the jet planes would put off the dogs something awful. And when the hounds were confused, the foxes would get away.

And to Dr. Neil Bass, who is a marine biologist and ought to know better. Dr. Bass says he is pretty sure there is a monster in Scotland's Loch Morar, about 35 miles from Loch Ness, where everybody's true favorite monster lives. Another monster, indeed. Pay no attention to him, Nessie.

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