A former featherweight boxer from Minnesota, 70-year-old Augie Ratner, has advertised his own funeral in the personal column, not because death seems imminent—he never felt better—but because he would like to know what "the official attendance" will be. Someone pointed out that friends who respond to the ad may go before he does. "I'll just have to go through the file, adding and subtracting," says Augie. "It docs sort of put a man under obligation, doesn't it?"
This is positively the last report on the kooky happenings in Memphis. First it was Dennis, the youth who donned twigs and leaves and announced he was a tree (SI, Aug. 9). Now along comes Memphis Fire Chief Charles Torian, who has taken to hiding firemen in fake trees to nab false alarmists. So far the agents concealed in their wire, wood and canvas trees have captured 20 miscreants. Might have caught more, too, but the trees are used only at night because "they are not perfect replicas."