"I got you coming loud and clear, Pope Paul," is Cash's supposed response. "But listen, I got to have some big Green Stamps in my pocket this trip. Or I'm outbound and down 10-77. I'm gone."
It wouldn't be the craziest thing that has happened in baseball this spring.
Arlene Hiss' well-publicized debut in big-time auto racing, when she finished last among the 14 cars completing the Jimmy Bryan 150 at Phoenix, has moved some drivers to talk of boycotting the Trenton 200 on April 25 if she is allowed to race in it.
"There was quite a bit of concern over her performance at Phoenix," says Jack Martin, director of public affairs for the U.S. Auto Club. "Dick King, director of competition, will have to decide whether she can drive at Trenton. We have had cases where drivers have been asked to get more experience. The late Eddie Sachs was one."
"The new superchauvinists are the ones making the flak," complains Mrs. Hiss. "They don't want a woman in the race."
Most of the drivers at Phoenix criticized her. "She was in the way all day," says winner Bobby Unser. "She was a hazard," says Pancho Carter. "She almost put me in the third-turn fence late in the race." Bill Vukovich, who did not qualify at Phoenix, says, "She has no business out there. She's going to hurt somebody if they let her keep driving." Gary Bettenhausen says, "Neither she nor any woman can handle the sport physically. She says she didn't get tired at Phoenix, and I agree. It's pretty tough to get tired going as slow as she was."
On the other hand, Johnny Rutherford says, "I'd rather have her out there than a couple of guys I can think of. At least she keeps in a straight line."
Hiss, who has a conditional USAC license, could be eligible for the Indianapolis 500. "She's been fast in practice," a USAC official says, "and she's been racing for 14 years. Of course, the cars she's been driving are not as powerful as the Indianapolis type."
A second woman, Janet Guthrie, a 13-year veteran of the sports-car circuit who holds an international license, has already been nominated to drive in the 500 by owner-builder Rolla Vollstedt. Guthrie recently told reporters in Indianapolis, "I'm not here to prove a point. I'm in racing because I love it. I think it's high time a woman raced at Indy, and I have the background and experience to handle it."