Scorecard

To this end, Sonny Werblin and Jack Krumpe, the wheels under the project, will release about 10 pigeons on Aug. 17 from the top of the Empire State Building for a flight to Meadowlands. In a test the other day, the fastest pigeon made it in five minutes, 40 seconds.

For humans who might have qualms about jumping off the Empire State Building, trying to flap their way across the Hudson and letting down in the erstwhile Jersey swamp, the six-mile drive from midtown Manhattan will take about 20 minutes. In traffic? That's when you'll wish you were a pigeon.

LUNCH WITH WOODY

What was billed as the Big Ten's annual Kickoff Luncheon in Chicago last week turned out to be Woody Hayes' annual Blast-off Tirade. It was far more entertaining than listening to coaches ramble on about who would start at left tackle.

Hear Hayes as he got going: "...and let me say in front of every coach sitting here, if I catch any of you cheating, I'll turn you in. Did I turn in the team [ Michigan State] that cheated in our league? I turned them in. Damned right I did! And I'll do it again if necessary. Because this is about all we've got left in this country—the integrity of our sport."

His reference was to the three-year probation handed Michigan State for recruiting violations, an episode that brought down the coach and athletic director. NCAA officials say they could not recall another time when a school had publicly admitted that it snitched on another. Through all this, Michigan State's new coach, Darryl Rogers, sat as composedly as he could. He later commented, "I've never been to Columbus and I've just met Woody Hayes and I don't think I'm going to like either one."

Hayes went off to a press conference at which the sports editor of the Michigan State student newspaper, Ed Ronders, notified Woody that the paper was going to publish a story this week on alleged football illegalities at Ohio State. Hayes exploded and chased Ronders across the room; Ronders, faster in the sprint, eluded him.

Bob Page of Detroit radio station WJR then stopped by to ask Hayes his gut reaction to Rogers' comments. Woody proceeded, Page says, to smack the radioman atop the forehead with the fat of his hand. At which time reporters started saying they thought they had better amble on back to their offices and thanks-very-much-Woody.

Ohio State opens its season Sept. 11 in Columbus—against Michigan State.

TIRE TROUBLE