? Bill Bergey, Philadelphia Eagles' linebacker, after the team's first win following seven straight losses, six in exhibition games: "Every week when I get home, my son Jason asks, 'Who beat you today, Dad?' What a great feeling to be able to tell the little twerp we won."
?Lonnie Teper, sports information director at Cal State Los Angeles, reporting that a spy had been seen sneaking away from a tower near the team's practice field: "Actually, we're flattered. We were 1-7-1 last year."
? Al McGuire, Marquette basketball coach: "I don't know why people question the academic training of a student-athlete. Half the doctors in the country graduated in the bottom half of their class."