The problem is mounting because geese tend to migrate back to their birth-place, which for increasing numbers is southeastern Pennsylvania. Last spring, the state trapped some goslings and packed them off to South Carolina in the hope they'd consider that home. They probably won't because everyone knows geese are smarter than bureaucrats. At least, these geese have been. The state tried trapping them and sending them to western Pennsylvania; the birds flew back. The experts tried using a noisemaker to startle the birds; they got used to it. Helium balloons were put up to frighten the birds; the balloons deflated.
Fortunately—or unfortunately, depending on which side you are on—the state does have a 90-day goose season and has upped the limit from two a day to three.
When a horse named Dentures got loose on the track at Balmoral Park, Ill. and was scratched, the announcer intoned. "Pull Dentures from the first race."
RICHARDS VS. OTHERS
Renee Richards, the transsexual tennis player, ultimately will be one of history's footnotes. Which is appropriate for a 43-year-old woman with very average ability. But once again, other women pros are making too much of her.
In a Columbus, Ohio tournament, Helle Viragh, 21, was one point from losing to Richards when she walked off the court in protest. Viragh was fined $500, but was hardly repentant. "I'd do it again," she said. In the next round, Beth Norton, 20, was way behind when she, too, walked off. She was fined $5,000, which shows the price of protest is spiraling.
Viragh was miffed because Richards, as a result of legal rulings, does not have to take a sex-determination test like all the other players. Norton feels it's unfair to compete against a middle-aged person who used to play men's tennis. Norton also says that it's against her religious and moral convictions to play someone like Richards.
But would either have abandoned the court had she been winning? Of course not. Moral and philosophical indignation do not run that deep.
It's aggravating to be beaten anytime, and perhaps even more aggravating to be beaten by Richards. But temper tantrums are not the proper remedy; playing winning tennis is.
USING THE OUTDOORS