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SCORECARD
Edited by Robert H. Boyle
June 05, 1978
FORE! Former President Gerald Ford, who shows signs of wanting to return to the White House in 1980, ought to check over the press releases sent out by his office. One recently noted that golfer Ford, who made a hole in one last year, made another recently. The release concluded, "The odds of a former President making two holes-in-one within a year are as unlikely as his returning to the White House in 1980."
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June 05, 1978

Scorecard

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O.K., Woody, you can relax now. Ohio State finally showed it can win the big one. Mark Schad and Stuart Ensor, a couple of Buckeye animal science majors, made the point a fortnight ago when they launched Brown Beauty, a Leghorn hen, to the championship of the Seventh Annual International Chicken Flying Meet in Rio Grande, Ohio, with a flight of 113'5".

The event attracted a crowd of 1,200, who watched as each of the 119 entries was nudged into flight, more or less, from a mailbox perched 10 feet above the ground. The world record of 297'2" was set last year by Kung Flewk, a Japanese black-tail Bantam. Kung Flewk died over the winter, but her owner, Gary Wright, a radio executive from Dubuque, Iowa, was there with the old champ's daughter, Kung Flewk Too. Kung Flewk Too flew, too. She flapped 80 feet to the rear and was automatically disqualified. Then there was Charlie Loving of Round Rock, Texas, who trains flying chickens for owner Guich Koock, who plays Harley Puckett on TV's Carter Country. Loving confidently predicted victory for Cocoa Cluck, a Bantam-red rock cross, even though she was late in arriving because the airlines had lost her with Loving's luggage. Cocoa Cluck flew only 10 inches before turning around and being disqualified, prompting Loving to tell Bob Evans, a sausage tycoon who hatched up the contest, "Find her a good home, and if that fails, any old skillet will do."

FOUR-STAR PRODUCTION

In case you ever doubted that folks in Kentucky worship basketball players, listen to this. Four seniors—Rick Robey, Jack Givens, James Lee and Mike Phillips—from Kentucky's NCAA championship team drew more than 100,000 emotional fans in 31 towns during a barnstorming tour of the state that ended last week. In Harlan an 85-year-old woman kissed each of the players, and in Carter County 13-year-old LaDonna Griffith broke down and cried when she had Robey autograph her basketball—for the second time.

Using fill-ins for the fifth man, the seniors competed against an AAU team managed by Scotty Baesler, a Lexington lawyer and former Kentucky player who had the foresight to begin scheduling the tour even before the Wildcats won the NCAA title. "Each of the UK players will make about $10,000," says Baesler, who also set up pregame receptions, which fans gladly paid extra to attend.

VAYA CON DIOS

British sportswriters, who are used to violence by soccer fans at home, have been cautioned to watch their steps when they go to Argentina for the World Cup finals later this month. The warning comes from Britain's leftist National Union of Journalists which is opposed to Argentina's ruling military junta for its curbs on press and trade unions. In a Journalist's Guide the union cautions writers covering the Cup not to look subversive, but provides a handy list of Spanish phrases in the event they do. For example, "Dejen de torturarme, por favor," which means, "Please stop torturing me."

Other excerpts:

"Mi peri�dico les pagar� bien si me dejen ir," or, "My newspaper will pay you well if you let me go." And if that doesn't work, "Por favor entregen mi cuerpo a mi familia" which means, "Please deliver my body to my family."

GETTING AWAY FROM IT ALL

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