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Teaching Tiger Cub Control
Steve Rushin
January 15, 2007
IN LIFE, there are three—and only three—things I do that Tiger Woods does not: 1) frisk myself for a second ball before teeing off on water holes, 2) check the LESS THAN $25 MILLION box when surveys ask for my annual income and 3) scrub vomit off my shirt at least twice a week, as though I were a Tilt-A-Whirl operator or a roadie for the Allman Brothers.
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January 15, 2007

Teaching Tiger Cub Control

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You may sit across from Lou Holtz on an airplane and hear him tell you, "Girls are wonderful until age 10; then they're trouble. Boys are the other way around." But in fact you'll find that all children, from Day One, instill terror and joy, worry and pride, often all in the same instant.

While giving your child a bath, you will leave the room for 15 seconds to answer the telephone. Bad idea. You will return to find her face down, thrashing in the water, and when you pull her from the tub and scream, "What in the name of God were you doing?" she will smile through a white beard of soapsuds and say, "Swimming!"

And you will clutch at your racing heart and shout the only thing that you can think of, which is: "Honey, get the camera!"

SOUND OFF
If you have a comment for Steve Rushin, send it to rushin@siletters.com.

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