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YOU LOOKED at paperboy-size Bears quarterback Rex Grossman warming up before Super Bowl XLI in his too-big shoulder pads and his altar-boy face and you thought, Hey, some kid won a contest to get on the field!
And after seeing him fumble, trip and heave passes that looked like bags full of kittens while leading the Bears right down the American Standard in a 29--17 loss to the Colts, you looked into the lost eyes of Rex Grossman and you thought, Someday soon, this young man has every chance to be my server at the Olive Garden.
And it's a shame because after the murderous week he went though in Miami, getting shot full of loaded questions from the world's media—many of which sounded like, "Are you surprised how much you suck?"—it got to where you really started to pull for him. You wanted him to chew up Peyton Manning himself, dachsund over Doberman, and make them all stick it where the blog don't shine.
But no brain-bearing fan can actually believe in this guy. He couldn't do the simplest of things. He muffed snaps. He was intercepted twice. He fumbled twice. He sacked himself. He seemed to be playing in ski boots and oven mitts. He came into this game with the reputation as possibly the worst quarterback ever to reach the Super Bowl and somehow tarnished that.
Yes, you say, but it was raining! Well, Manning didn't fumble a single snap, and he had way more of them than Grossman. This might be because a few times a year Manning will drag a big bucket of water onto the practice field and make his center snap him soaked footballs. (And you wonder why some guys do all the winning.)
Just to give you an idea, check out this crucial series midway through the third quarter, when Chicago trailed only 19--14. After wideout Muhsin Muhammad picked up a nice gain with a catch on first down, here's what happened next:
Second-and-one: Grossman trips, loses 11 yards.
Third-and-12: Grossman botches the snap and falls on the ball like it's a live grenade, loses 11 yards.