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SI: You played soccer at William and Mary (1981-83) and scored 10 goals in your career (right). Is college soccer a natural springboard to the Oscars?
Stewart: Yes, because back in the day we played with wireless mics on.
SI: Are sports as mockable as politics?
Stewart: No, sports are just too important.
SI: If I say Johnny Weir, you say....
Stewart: I think he is actually more masculine than most figure skaters. He brings a heterosexual vibe to that sport. I don't think he's gay enough. He's got to go further!
Stewart: It's as though the Germans are some sort of perfect beings. Almost genetically superior in some respects. But I'm sure they won't do anything with that knowledge.
SI: Why didn't the Winter Olympics get better TV ratings?
Stewart: How many ways can you watch someone go downhill? But I'm looking forward to the next Olympics. I'm responsible for much of the choreography of the opening ceremonies in Beijing. I'm working on that now.