The Show

Good to be here. Are you like me? Ever since the Barry Bonds press conference last week, you can't get the theme for Sanford and Son out of your head?

Temple coach John Chaney suspended for rest of season It's all part of the NCAA's "Icon Busting Saturday."

During a loss to St. Joseph's the Temple coach put in a benchwarmer to purposely commit hard fouls. Chaney is still embarrassed. Of course he is. I'm sure he's thinking, Why didn't I send a goon to break John Calipari's arm in 1994?

Scientists discover previously undetectable steroid It's called DMT. Apparently its molecular structure is very similar to DMV, except the lines are much shorter.

Sprinter Kelli White claimed she was told by BALCO chief Victor Conte to make up the story that she took steroids for narcolepsy despite not having the disease. I think that was the story, but I nodded off halfway through.

Conte was one of the first bass players for Tower of Power. Of course, back then, the band was 30 pounds lighter and known as Tower of Singles Hitters.

Jose Canseco offers to take a lie detector test on Pay-Per-View I don't know about you, but I'm not plunking down any money unless there's a guarantee I'll hear the word gonad.

Canseco was planning to auction his 2000 world championship ring from the Yankees for $40,000. And for an extra $10,000 he was willing to throw in the matching electronic ankle bracelet.

Canseco canceled his book tour after an alleged death threat. Police have narrowed the suspects to 5% to 7% of the players' union.

MLB ratified a five-year contract with the umpires' union, which included a 5% raise. Meanwhile, Questec got seven years and a 10% bump.