I feel sorry for
certain people. Leon Spinks's orthodontist. Bode Miller's agent. Anybody in a
ham-eating contest with James Gandolfini.
But nobody has it
worse than the poor souls in marketing for some major league baseball
Thanks to owners
with the financial acumen of Mike Tyson, baseball has no salary cap, which
means only about 10 teams out of 30 have a chance to win a championship. They
know it. We know it. Tibetan monks know it.
So the marketing
guys have to come up with a slogan that will lure fans to the park without
flat-out deceiving them. I mean, it's not like the Kansas City Royals can put
up billboards that read FOLLOW US TO THE WORLD SERIES!
In the world of
advertising, this is considered a very tough sell. Like pitching Asian chickens
or fur sinks or vacation time-shares in Kabul.
continue to amaze with their ability to find something good about their teams.
Take a look at this year's batch of marketing slogans.
TAMPA BAY DEVIL
RAYS--Coming Soon! Major League Baseball!
TIGERS--We Guarantee We'll Get More Wins Than the Lions!
ORIOLES--Steroid-free Since February!