Oh, How I Love A Good Gag

Hey, I'm not picking on just the superstars. I enjoy watching any pro play like me. Padraig Harrington, the Irish wiz, could have and should have won this Open. But on Saturday he made a triple-bogey 7 on the 18th that featured a 15-yard dribbler from the rough. Massive swat at it. Fifteen yards. Bad out. Three-putt. Thanks for stopping by the booth.

Even Jim Furyk--the guy who swings as if he's trapped in his car with a bee--missed a putt no longer than his arm on his final hole. And then the truth hit him. "I think that just cost me a shot at a playoff," he said, the words coming out of his mouth like lead matzo balls.

But nobody needed to bathe in Bactine more than Mickelson, who apologized to his fans, then guessed he'd probably spend the next three days in bed.

As for Monty, he sighed and said, "I look forward to coming back next year to try another U.S. Open disaster."

Lord, I just can't wait.

If you have a comment for Rick Reilly, send it to reilly@siletters.com.