School For The Uncool

The one person Brady has always wanted to meet is Tiger Woods, but he's never had the nerve to introduce himself, even after he was in Woods's gallery recently outside Boston.

Shy is cool. Check.

His rival for top QB in the league, Peyton Manning, has done every commercial short of adult diapers, but Brady has done almost zero, even though, with his looks and charm and game, he could sell pogo sticks to seniors.

"You realize you're turning down a lot of dough, yeah, but it's just not me. I'm just not going to go out and do a Chunky Soup ad.... Like that [ MasterCard] ad Peyton did about, 'Cut that meat! Cut that meat!'—our D-line yelled that every time he came up to the line. 'Cut that meat!' Man, I'm so glad I didn't do that one."

Integrity. Check.

Ask him: What about a bar in Hollywood? Or a restaurant in SoHo? It would be the hottest joint since Bachelors III! He looks at you like you're from Pluto. "You mean, like Namath's? Oh, man, my mom loved Joe Namath. But I don't think I could pull off something like that."

Modesty. Check.

See, Brady is Namath with a milk mustache. Mothers want him for supper and daughters for everything after. O.K., you might say, but how cool is it to get one woman pregnant ( Moynahan) and be dating another ( B�ndchen)? Well, a) Brady says he didn't know Moynahan was pregnant until after they'd broken up, and b) Brady is aching to be a full-time dad. He was there three weeks ago for the birth of John Edward Thomas Moynahan.

"I kind of cuddled him like a football," Brady says, adding that it's killing him that he can't be in Los Angeles for every sneeze. "I'd love to be out there all the time, year-round, but it's hard to make that a reality. I live here. But I'll start lobbying for off days throughout the year."

Personal responsibility. Check.