Overheard last Saturday outside the Cotton Bowl, where the Texas State Fair raged on, and inside the stadium, where the Texas State Unfair was played out--with No. 2 Oklahoma aiming to barbecue No. 5 Texas for the fifth straight year.
Unidentified Oklahoma fan, walking past the fair rides before the game: "You think if we beat 'em again, a Texas fan will climb to the top of the Ferris wheel and jump?"
His buddy: "Nah, he'd quit halfway up."
Beer-guzzling Texas fan, just inside a stadium gate: "You know what you get when you put 30 Oklahoma fans in the same room? A full set of teeth."
Beer-guzzling Oklahoma fan, not much later: "You know what happens to a Texas fan when he takes Viagra? He gets taller."
OU flag girl Becka Smith, after she ran onto the field during the presentation of the Big 12 team flags with the Texas flag purposely rolled up tight on the pole: "I wanted to hang it upside down, but they said I'd get kicked off [the flag team]."
Gray-haired OU fan, realizing that he was seated smack dab on football's 38th parallel, the 50-yard line that divides the Cotton Bowl into perfect burnt-orange and crimson-red halves: "I don't like sittin' this close to a Texas fan, but he seems pretty nice. I guess their manners have gotten a lot better since we're always whuppin' up on 'em."
The goateed Texas fan stuck next to him: "Hey, we got 17 more wins than you [in the 104-year series history]."
Burly Texas fan Gabriel Pineda, sitting in the first row, as OU takes a 3--0 lead: "The problem with this game is it starts so dang early [11 a.m. kickoff, CDT]. There's no time to get enough drinks in you."
Guy behind him: "The way you guys are playin', you need it."