3. Turns to the other riders and says, "Oooh, I'm sooooo scared."
2. Instead of training, spent last two months pimping his bike.
1. Has started selling ad space on his ass.
THEY SAID IT
"HE'S GOING to win, and I'm going to win. There's no need to worry about either race anymore." -- PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH, after watching the 2004 Tour de France aboard Air Force One, July 16, 2004
"A LOT of people thought Lance Armstrong was crazy trying to come back, but he did it. He was probably one of the biggest inspirations, other than my faith in God. Reading his books inspired me to continue to fight and to overcome and not succumb to the situation." -- NBA center and kidney transplant survivor ALONZO MOURNING, in the Rocky Mountain News, Nov. 20, 2004
"I FOLLOW the Tour de France about as much as the average North American person. I only know of it because of the success that Lance Armstrong has had. Michael Jordan was the greatest athlete I ever saw. Tiger Woods is now at a point where he is going to go down in history as something special. There's not a question that Lance Armstrong belongs with those two. Not only because of what he has done as an athlete but also what he has been able to come back from." -- WAYNE GRETZKY, at the 2002 ESPYs
"YOU HAVE been an inspiration to me and many people you will never know. They see what you have done and it gives them hope, strength and the desire to overcome cancer and other diseases." --Former New York City mayor and cancer survivor RUDY GIULIANI, 2001
LANCE'S NEW WHEELS
THE BRIGHT LIGHTS of Tinseltown often shine on Armstrong, especially following a Tour de France victory. As a guest on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno in September 2004 following his sixth consecutive title, Armstrong was presented with a custom-made motorcycle (" Lance Armstrong Bike") designed and created for him on the Discovery Channel's American Chopper. The Chopper crew--Paul Teutul Sr. (far left), Paul Teutul Jr. (far right) and Mikey Teutul (second from right)--visited Nike's headquarters in search of inspiration to come up with a design for a bike that commemorated Armstrong's cycling accomplishments and the Livestrong Foundation. The result was a futuristic machine that almost looked like something out of Blade Runner. For a closer look at the bike, check out the photos posted at http://www.orangecountychoppers.com/occweb_ver2_theme2.php.