Larry Bird, the basketball star, has two streets named after him: Larry Bird Avenue in Terre Haute, Ind., site of his alma mater, Indiana State, and Larry Bird Boulevard in French Lick, Ind., his hometown. John Wooden, the old UCLA basketball coach, also has two streets: Wooden Drive in Placentia, Calif. and John R. Wooden Drive in Martinsville, Ind., where he was a high school star.
Baton Rouge, La. has a whole gazetteer's worth of roads named for athletes. Near the Louisiana State campus are several streets honoring famous LSU athletes: Alvin Dark Avenue, Bob Pettit Boulevard, Jim Taylor Avenue, Y.A. Tittle Avenue. Near Southern University in Baton Rouge are Davenport Street (for Olympic hurdler Willie) and Brock Street (for baseball's Lou), as well as Joe Louis Court.
Also in Baton Rouge is a subdivision called Wimbledon Estates, in which streets are named for tennis players: Don Budge, Fred Perry, Ham Richardson, Jack Kramer, John Newcombe, Maureen Connolly, Lew Hoad, Rod Laver, Roy Emerson. It even has a Backcourt Street. For those who count chariot racing as a sport, Baton Rouge has Ben Hur Road.
Inside The Indianapolis Motor Speedway is Shaw Drive, named for Wilbur Shaw, who won the 500 in 1937, '39 and '40, and outside it is Tony Hulman Way, named for the man who ran the Speedway for so many years. Arcadia, Calif. has Longden Avenue for jockey Johnny Longden, and Edmonds, Wash. has a boulevard named after Rosalynn Sumners, the figure skater. In Seattle, there's even a road named for a newspaper sports editor: Royal Brougham Boulevard.
On the other side of the continent, in Natick, Mass., a new connector road between two shopping areas is to be named for a local boy who made good at Boston College. Flutie Pass, of course.
Columbia has a new football coach, Jim Garrett, who apparently has wandered into the wrong party. Before the season started, Garrett, a grizzled NFL veteran, a former Giants and Browns assistant coach, delivered himself of such un-Ivy utterances as this: "I'm insulting and demanding, and I'll put a spotlight on a player who's erred and make it clear he's let us down." And this: "I've not been at all patient and understanding." And: "I may not be the right man for this job. I may be too demanding."
Well, Columbia's players can't say they weren't warned. The Lions blew a 17-0 lead and lost to Harvard 49-17 in Garrett's debut on Saturday, and he wasn't happy. "They are drug-addicted losers," he said of his players. "One adversity comes and—Bang!—they're right back in the sewer again." As promised, he put the spotlight on an errant player, punter Pete Murphy. "Lousy punts," said Garrett. "I just told the squad he'll never kick for me again."
Lest you think the coach completely forgot he was in the Ivies, note that he added this about Murphy: "I want to see him when he graduates and goes to work downtown on Wall Street and does three things that he did today. See how long he's gonna work for that company, how long Merrill Lynch or Smith Barney is gonna have him around."
TAKING THE FALL IN FRANCE